Beijing Boyce

As I shuffled the street pre-coffee one recent morning, my synapses fired briefly and inspired this thought - if someone asked me to suggest places in my Sanlitun-Workers Stadium hood to grab a cup of java, what would they be? Off the top of my head, here are four picks. (By the way, I’m no coffee expert, so if anyone has other recommendations, let me know and I’ll give them a try.)

Le Petit Gourmand’s American coffee (RMB15) - a good-value beverage served in a glass with a handle and space for the spoon, thus saving every fifth diner from knocking their utensil to the floor. (LPG is a good place to chill, as long as the staff doesn’t play that CD of “What’s Going On?” remixes.)

Cafe St Laurent Cappuccino (RMB30) - this weekend brunch favorite gets marks for size and frothiness. Check this video of a sugar cube slowly disappearing into the lather like a… uh… uh… a stunned mastodon sinking inch by inch into the murky-molasses-thick depths of a foamy Pleistocene swamp a sugar cube slowly disappearing into the lather.

Revelations’ Lavazza coffee (RMB8) - diners can tag this ridiculously low-priced beverage on to their equally wallet-positive set lunch (they start at ~RMB30).

Sequoia Cafe’s large American Coffee (RMB22) - a sizable mug of coffee from a micro-roaster in the U.S. that nicely washes down this place’s BLT. The staff is friendly here, though the disproportionate number of hard surfaces means it can get noisy.

For those looking to enjoy the great outdoors, Aperitivo (you can watch the street life), Le Bistrot Parisienne (ditto), Les Tour des Jour (ditto II, though this place tends to blast music) and The Bookworm (a spacious rooftop) are other options.

No sooner does the Homer Simpson Celebrity Pub Crawl end than a beer and chocolate tasting appears on the high-cal radar. D’oh!

In any case, Sequoia Cafe will forgo the usual Friday night wine tasting and instead feature samples of five Belgian beers and chocolates (RMB100). RSVP with Frank at frank.siegel@gmail.com / 13701-178-073.

(Note: If you like chocolate and you live in Beijing, then check out Elyse Ribbon’s group Chocojing, though I’m sure she has enough on her plate this week with Lethal English).

They say there’s no such thing as a free lunch. But you can go hungry even if you have money.

I popped into The Rickshaw yesterday at noon for Taco Tuesdays (three tacos for RMB40 with good portions of sour cream and salsa). I went upstairs and found a construction crew buzzing and pounding near the pool table, so I retreated downstairs, grabbed a chair, and popped open the laptop.

I called the manager to find out what was going on and learned that the place was closed. I missed the sign on the door as did everyone else - more than a dozen people – who showed up during the 20 minutes I sat there. Anyway, The Rickshaw should have its side deck opened and be back to normal hours from 4 PM today

Since tacos were not in my immediate future, I decided to go to nearby Revelations. I phoned ahead to see if the wireless was working - last time, it wasn’t - and was told it “should be.” It wasn’t.

I packed up my laptop again and went to Sugar, in 1949: The Hidden City. The place had wireless and food, seemingly a rare combination on this day. I had chicken Caesar salad (RMB32) and a coffee (RMB25), both of which were good. The wait staff is a bit over-attentive and unable to recognize English words such as “water” and “toilet”, but is friendly enough. What is annoying is getting the bill and finding a 10 percent service charge… at a cafe.

Today, I planned to go to Café St. Laurent for lunch. Luckily, I called ahead because the place is closed while the kitchen and menu are overhauled. CSL will open this weekend. Fortunately, the eggs Benedict will remain on the menu although there will be a few new twists to the recipe.

I headed for The Saddle Cantina, then remembered it is not open for lunch during weekdays, and redirected myself to Luga’s. This place is also under construction. I saw a patron eating a burrito, but didn’t see any employees. I yelled “hello” and went back to the kitchen, where everyone was crouched over the floor intensely discussing something, so I left.

For the third time in two weeks, I ended up at Sequoia Café (Sanlitun branch). The BLT (RMB30) is delicious and comes with soup, and a large American coffee (RMB22). Fortunately, there is no service charge. The only downside: Sequoia is full of hard surfaces and thus loud at times.

Garden Books is now open above Sequoia Cafe (Guanghua Lu branch) providing yet another spot in the city to relax with a coffee and a book. The shop takes over the space that formerly held Tim’s Texas BBQ and, before that, John Bull Pub.

There are plenty of books about China, though these tend toward the tourist-y series types, as well as Hemingway, Atwood, Kerouac, Updike, Camus, Grisham, King, and so on. Ford Prefect fans will find Douglas Adams “Ultimate Hitcherhiker’s Guide to the Universe”, while members of the Beijing Barack Obama fan club can pick up the man’s memoirs - Dreams from My Father.

Food and drink lovers will also find some nice stuff, including Larousse Gastronomique, The Culinary Institute of America’s Professional Chef (Seventh Edition), and Hugh Johnson’s How to Enjoy Wine.There is also Harry G. Frankfurt’s “On Bullshit” - the owner says he has sold about 500 copies of this in his Shanghai branch.

Alan Ujcic: ‘Welcome to Slovenia!’

Thirty-five people gathered for the most recent Friday night gathering at Sequoia Café as Alan Ujcic arranged a second tasting of wines from his homeland - Slovenia. The event followed up on a similar tasting at Sequoia last year. Ujcic seemed to enjoy the night, except for my continued singing of a revised version of the Albania song from Wag the Dog. ‘Slo-ve-ni-a, Slo-ve-ni-a, it borders on the A-dri-a-tic…’

In any case, two wines hailed from regions near Austria and five from the Italian side. Based on a sampling of people in the room, the favorites seemed to be.

• Radona Silver sparkling wine NV, with a green-yellow color, a touch of sweetness, and stone fruits on its nose and light body. (”I’d serve this with ham and melon,” said PA).
• Princic Merlot 2005, with some cherry and plum jamminess on the nose, and a soft body with some cherries, red fruit and a touch of funkiness. (”It’s got a bit of barnyard smell and I mean that in a good way,” said PA.)
• Cotar Cabernet Sauvignon 2000, with blackberry on the nose and body, as well as earthiness and soft tannins.

Several people also cited the Scurek Rose 2006 (with peach and strawberry flavours) as their favorite and the Quercus Pinot Noir 2003 garnered a few good comments. The reds tended to suffer from too much tannin and not enough fruit. The tasting cost RMB 100 per person, and included cheese, bread, assorted meats, sandwiches and brownies.

Starting with the whites…

About 35 tasters showed up

It really does border on the Adriatic!

Alan Ujcic: ‘You want more, don’t you?’

The Slovenian tasting: a wine map (click to enlarge)

I have been making the rounds with my laptop in search of spots that offer decent food, drink, and online access. This is part four of my winter wireless wrap-up. (Previously: The Rickshaw; Le Petit Gourmand; The Stone Boat)

Sequoia Café (Guanghua Street)

The good
- Tasty coffee, brownies and sandwiches - tuna pita, steak and cheese, and, highly popular for some reason, “turkeyberry”
- Plenty of plugs means plenty of places to sit
- Service is generally OK
- If you want to work amid journalists, this is the place to be in Beijing, given that many bureaus are located nearby
- Garden Books is opening on the second floor, which means you can take a break from your screen and get reacquainted with paper

The bad
- Too many hard surfaces means the place gets noisy
- If you leave any time between 5 and 7 PM, expect to struggle for a taxi

The wireless
- The signal is good. Surf to your heart’s delight in the smaller room (non-smoking) or larger one (smoking allowed).

* Sequoia Cafe has an outlet in Sanlitun North (home to Friday night wine tastings) and a kiosk in Shunyi.

Next: The Bookworm

Browns replaced by a restaurant called Revelations? A place called The Rickshaw becoming a hotspot? Large-scale outfits RBL, Rui Fu and nhu biting the dust? Good Chinese wine popping up in bars, restaurants and five-star hotels? They’re all part of Beijing’s 2007 nightlife story. A few highlights from that tale, as seen in this blog…

January-February

Now, *that’s* a topic for a blues song
Backed by Handel Lee (The Courtyard, Three on the Bund), featuring live Chicago blues bands in Icehouse, and lacking obvious signage on a street heavily visited by tourists, RBL sinks in Wangfujing and drags down more investors than you can count on your fingers. The venue is expected to resurface this year in Lee’s next project - The Legation. Perhaps, the best take on this is from a reader.

See Meltdown at Icehouse; Icehouse: Did It Stand a Snowball’s Chance?

Dang, my tanktop is at the cleaners
My first pub crawl of 2007 is with Eddie O. We hit Cheers (Wild Turkey and live Xinjiang music), China Doll (people watching), Swing (great band but minimal toilet facilities; as Eddie says, “They want you to buy the beer here and process it somewhere else”) and Browns (featuring what seem to be bit players from The Dukes of Hazzard or Talladega Nights).

See On the Go with Eddie O (Again)

Then I craved sunflower seeds
Rather than allow a rude mobile phone-using jerk in The Bookworm raise my blood pressure, Beijing Boyce (v2007) uses the inane conversation to play a game.

See Choose the gerbil! 

And he even started to like sparkling wine
Frank Siegel holds his first weekly wine tasting of 2007 at Sequoia Café, with four wines and five cheeses from Canada. Over the next year, he will build the city’s best wine community as he covers vino from six continents, organizes vertical, varietal and blind tastings, brings in winemakers and winery owners, and patronizes a wide range of distributors.

See Say Cheese, Eh?

Buy 2, get 1… hey, wait a minute!
Reigning “bar of the year” Browns nears its first anniversary - bad specials, rotating personnel and unfinished décor suggest the place is on the decline and needs to get its act together. Six months later, the place is closed, with its contents gutted and the whereabouts of its managing partner a mystery.

See Browns: Love It…?

Neither do references to “smoked meat”
Taking a page from danwei.org, I sex up the site to see if it generates traffic. I learn that deliberately including typos - i.e. changing Tim’s Texas BBQ to Tim’s Sex-Ass BBQ – doesn’t work.

See Did Someone Say Sex?

If anyone needs some quality used underwear…
The newsletter that spun off this blog reaches its thirty-third edition and… 100,000 words. Book deal, reality TV show and newspaper column offers pour in, a flock of 88 doves continually circles my whereabouts, thousands of women throw their panties on stage, and global peace / a baby boom ensues. Or, I start working on the next 100,000 words. It was one of those two…

Please save the “leaded or unleaded” jokes
My mission for 2007: find seven decent Chinese wines that you can buy in Beijing for less than 700 kuai total. My first blind tasting: during Chinese New Year, with ten wines, seven tasters and a few clear winners. (Note: the best wine glass deal is at the Flower Market, where 22-ounce, thin-rimmed, Bordeaux-style Stone Island beauties are 10 kuai or less.)

See Say Grace: The search for seven good Chinese wines, part 1

All in the name of science
The Bourbon, Rye and Whisky League (BRAWL) meets at Tim’s Texas BBQ (now Sequoia Café) for a blind tasting of Kentucky Bourbon, Irish Whisky, Scotch and Canadian Rye. The Rye (Alberta Springs) edges the Irish Whisky (Bushmills) as favorite.

See BRAWL makes the call

Hints of minerals, notes of worms
Campbell Thompson gets down to earth and provides wine advice for an Inner Mongolian woman who subsists solely on dirt. Think about “terroir”, says he.

See A Shovel-full of Your Finest, Please

Or perhaps it’s a sprouting potato?
My long-standing discussion with Eddie O as to whether the Jagermeister mascot is a moose or a reindeer continues into the New Year.

See Moose or Reindeer?

Last Wednesday was one of those Beijing days…

My apartment building is a monstrous mouth, every unit is a tooth, and a deranged dentist methodically scrapes, hammers and drills each for a month, before starting all over again.

It’s the kind of nightmare from which one awakens - to the soothing vibrations of jackhammers, no less - when the jerks two floors above spend week after week renovating.

A bad way to start the day, but this one looks okay: a meeting with a wine industry guy, a slew of fun emails to write, and parties at a friend’s company and at Block 8 for “the ten most influential people in Beijing.” (In a major oversight, yours truly was not nominated, but as they say, to forgive is divine.)

Sequoia Cafe
Beijing’s road system forgot to take its city-sized ex-lax today, so I arrive 20 minutes late for my meeting. Actually, it took longer to cab it from my home near Workers’ Stadium (35 minutes) than to walk it (30 minutes).

My friend is not here, so I call … You’re stuck in traffic, I bet! … You’re not? Well, that’s lucky … I see, you realized half an hour after our meeting is supposed to start that you can’t make it… No, that’s okay, I love riding pointlessly around this city with a driver whose breath smells like dirty diapers.One of those days… anyway, I spend the day at Sequoia and drink enough caffeine to wire a baby whale. At 5:20, I figure out the logistics of getting home, changing into a suit, and returning just south of here at 7 PM. I decide to walk.True to form, the key components of Beijing post-work traffic are in full play:

One world, one dream (with a soundtrack of jackhammers and car horns)…

LG Towers
Suited, I leave home and take a cab at 7:05, destination LG Towers. The trip takes an hour. Add five minutes to find the right tower and floor, and I arrive at the office 20 minutes before the event ends. Here’s the best part: the party is on Thursday, which is tomorrow, rather than on Wednesday, which is today.

A lone employee is at the office. I apologize for disturbing her, explain my inability to comprehend the seven-day calendar, and leave a note for my friend. Bummed out, I leave LG Towers and spot…

Kenny Rogers Roasters
Less than a week ago, Special K had a hunger for roast chicken and we wondered if The Gambler, as we know him, had a franchise in Beijing. And he does! Things are looking up. I go in, sit down, and decide to play the safe hand and to order the restaurant’s namesake meal: the original roast chicken.

“Sorry, 15 minutes,” says the waitress. Hmm, a roast chicken place with no roast chicken ready. Granted, it is a bit late, so I decide to wait.

“Not 15 minutes, 40 minutes,” chimes in another waiter about 15 seconds later.

As Kenny sang, “you gotta know when to hold ‘em, know when to fold ‘em.” Well, you also gotta know when to roast ‘em. I leave and head to…

McDonald’s
I once went a decade without eating at Mickey D’s, but I am hungry now and combo number seven, displayed on a big poster, looks like the solution. I approach the cashier, say “number 7″ in Chinese and point at the poster. She has a deer in the headlights look. I say it in English and point again. Not even a blink. I hold up seven fingers. Nope. Finally someone else comes over and takes my order and soon I am scooting about with my tray looking for a place to sit.

Unfortunately, I eat near two people in their late twenties on what I guess is their first date. Not first date with each other, but, given the looks of them, first date ever. They are uncomfortable being across from a member of the opposite sex, especially at a distance of under ten meters, and I am a perfect diversion from their unease and played-out conversations about cell phone accessories, anime, Super Girl contestants, or whatever.

“Look, a foreigner,” says one, and points at me. “Yes, a foreigner,” says the other, and stares. They blush, but continue to look and make reference to me. It’s been a trying day, so I walk over, jam a chicken McNugget into each of their nostrils, draw a ketchup mustache beneath, stick pickle slices on their cheeks, and hoarsely whisper in Mandarin, “This is considered foreplay in New Jersey.” Actually, I made that up. Instead, I made a huffing sound and left. Little did I know, things were about to get worse - or better, depending on your perspective.

In part 2, Special K shares his fashion secrets, we drink bubbly at Block 8, neither of us makes the “most influential list” and a magazine editor yells at me.

Sequoia Cafe in Sanlitun offers the most imaginative, enjoyable and affordable wine tastings in Beijing. Period. Last Friday, I tried seven Austrian and German wines, munched on appetizers and chatted with wine distributors, a winemaker and plenty of friendly folk - all for 50 kuai. The tasting of eight Slovenian wines and the tasting where every attendee brought a bottle of wine and some cheese were also memorable. I can only see things getting better once Sequoia’s two decks open (to get on the event mailing list, email frank.siegel@gmail.com).

With an exhausting week behind me, I was going to call it an early evening after trying those wines. Fortunately, a new friend from Siberia steered me from evil. We ended up checking out:

- Kokomo: This place looks a bit better every time I visit, though the closed kitchen and our grumbling stomachs made this stop a quick one, as we headed to…

- Apertivo: It was packed, but comfortable, with an earthy feel and a calming rumble of conversations as background noise. More than a dozen wines are available by the glass, from 35 kuai, and my Sangiovese was a sizeable pour. The calzone hit the spot.

- Cheers: We popped our heads in to find the usual cast of characters and the band getting ready to unleash some Xinjiang music.

- China Doll: The second floor was getting crowded by 10:30 PM and I always enjoy propping my elbows against that soft, sloped bar edge and sipping a drink. China Doll has some promotion whereby two people who kiss for ten seconds get free drinks. What’s next? Spin the bottle? Truth or dare?

- Q Bar: Though it was busy, we wrangled two seats at the bar. As for drinks, I had my favorite of the year, an Alfonso Special, and then a Strawberry Margarita, which someone bought for me (I can guarantee you, this is not a cocktail for which ye olde Beijing Boyce parts with cash). I also tried a splash of Caol Ila 18-year-old single malt, which inspired me to rewrite my will and demand that I be embalmed with this liquid… Note 1: I ran into Trevor K, who makes the best burgers in town and will (hopefully) again organize, with Kenn, a few BBQs on Q Bar’s deck.  Note 2: The usual DJ was off, sparing us the dance music. Instead, his replacement had the good sense to play Peter Schilling’s Major Tom, Talk Talk’s It’s My Life and numerous other rarely heard tunes. Q Bar owners, this music is good! I repeat, this music is good!

- Browns: The bar was less crowded than usual, but the vibe more than made up for it, as did the 20-kuai Guinness, Kingfisher and Beamish served from the bathtub out front. It’d take about 10,000 words to describe the weirdness at Browns, so two brief sketches will have to suffice. First, there was a scraggly haired guy on the bar top, with biceps the size of Christmas turkeys, lots of tattoos and a baseball hat, whose dance routine consisted of pointing at his crotch, pointing at the crowd, and pulling his baseball cap over his face as though he were crying. For reasons that will confuse scientists and therapists for centuries, this stimulated numerous female patrons. Second, there was a girl on the bar top, who has obviously done some modeling, and she shook out her hair and jerked her lanky body about like a hyperactive vogue-ing insect-robot - it was better than it sounds and mesmerizing in strobe light. Also, being an empathetic person, I think I pulled a calf muscle just watching that display…

(By the way, what’s with the mini toll booth, they’ve set up on the street that goes past The Bookworm on the way to Browns? See below)

On Saturday, after doing my best to develop my carpal tunnel syndrome by answering about 70 emails in the afternoon, I went to a going away party for one of my favorite bloggers. Weirdly, I found myself sitting around a coffee table not only with him, but also with this blogger, this blogger, this blogger, this blogger and this blogger. Being the junior blogger, I didn’t know what to say, so I got on my Blackberry and left comments on their sites (kidding). Actually, this blogger earned his place in heaven, should I ever be on watch duty the day he approaches the pearly gates, as he showed up not only with a bottle of The Balvenie, but also one of Talisker, and later cracked open yet another The Balvenie before finishing with the equivalent of a dessert wine after a long and hearty “meal” of single malts - a 12-year-old Chivas. A smooth finish to a fun evening…

Wine Word: Expect to see Edward Ragg and Fongyee Walker, former Cambridge University Blind Wine Tasting Society captains, about town as they have relocated to Beijing. / Ex-ASC Fine Wines Marketing Director Campbell Thompson has headed to Australia to begin work on a Master’s in Wine Marketing, but will return to Beijing in a few months. Adam Steinberg will join ASC as communications director and step down from his volunteer position as co-organizer of Beijing Wine Club (BWC). Jenn Hinkle, who has been active in the wine scene, will become more involved in BWC. / Capone’s is offering two-for-one on two white and six red wines by the glass, as well as all alcoholic drinks, from 5 to 8 PM nightly. / Cafe Europa offers seven wines by the glass (40-45 kuai per) in its regularly rotating lineup. It has started a “lazy Sunday” breakfast menu (10 AM-3 PM): fruit juice, toast, grilled tomatoes, baked beans, two eggs with bacon or sausage, and free flow coffee or tea, for 50 kuai. Other options include pancakes with maple syrup and yoghurt with fruits, walnuts and honey. / By the way, Opener, two flights up from Cafe Europa, is a sedate nighttime getaway. The drinks are pricey, but this spacious artsy place offers a dozen bottled beers and a small Whiskey collection, mellow music and comfortable seating. / As for wine tasting events, Sequoia Cafe is continuing its excellent Friday night gatherings, with this week’s featuring Slovenian wines (6:30 PM, 50 kuai, RSVP required: call Frank at 13701-178-073). The Beijing Wine Club will hold a tasting of Australian boutique wines on March 3 at Hao Feng Cellars in the Henderson Center (7 PM; 150 kuai). ASC will have a Riedel wine dinner at the American Club on March 13 with company CEO with Maximillian von Riedel (6:30, 888 kuai, price includes four wine glasses). Summergate will hold a Chateau Lafite wine dinner at Aria on March 20 with winery CEO Christophe Salin (7 PM, 1888 kuai).

Opening Shots comes from the Beijing Boyce biweekly e-newsletter. To subscribe, send an email to beijingboyce@yahoo.com with “Eat, Drink & Be Merry” in the subject line.

Phil, of Phil’s Pub fame, has returned to Beijing for good after a long stint at Q Bar in Qingdao . / Sequoia Cafe in Sanlitun is drawing a fun crowd to its frequent Friday wine tastings. Email frank.siegel@gmail.com to get on the invite list. / Trivia addicts in Shunyi can get their fix at the Pomegranate on Wednesday nights. The bar had ten teams at the last quiz. / Months ago, it looked like Serve the People would soon open in the space where once stood Zing by Doodoo. Things have been in limbo so long I’m almost expecting a Serve the Doodoo or Zing the People to open. / Best ice cube in town: that huge Rubik’s cube-sized chunk that Q Bar uses for its Bourbon. / Thanks to H.S. for pointing out that one of the wines reviewed last issue is Church and State, not Church and Stone. / Goose and Duck, soon to relocate, was stuffed, so to speak, as that’s Beijing ’s held its Super Bowl party there Monday.

Note: I’ll start sending out the newsletter at lunch and after work today, and tomorrow.

Pictures, pictures, pictures - that’s my friend Kraft-D’s advice for this blog. Last night, I dug up a few dozen from a November 2005 trip to Taillan, a winery just outside Beijing. Sequoia Cafe owner Frank Siegel and the American Community Club co-organized the trip (for full details, see Tying One on at Taillan).

General Manager Alain Leroux (above, right) led our tour of Taillan, a ten-year-old Sino-French venture. He said that the vines are grafted to North American rootstalk to protect them from phylloxera, a kind of plant lice.

He also gave us some insights into producing wine in China. “At the beginning, French people thought it would be an easy market, but no.”

With that cleared up, we headed inside and learned that the vats can store up to 100,000 bottles worth of wine. Taillan has enough equipment to process thousands of bottles per hour, often doing bottling for other companies.

Our little group could never handle even an hour of Taillan’s output, but we were ready to try. After Frank unpacked a picnic lunch of cold cuts, cheese, breads and potato salad, we worked our way through what Alain called “drinkable” wines, including a 2000 Chardonnay, 2003 Rose, 2003 Malbec (my favorite), Merlot, 2001 Pinot Noir and 2003 Cabernet Sauvignon.

Drinkable, indeed!

A dozen of us gathered on January 5 in Sanlitun Sequoia Cafe to try four wines and cheeses from Canada. As I had just returned from two weeks in The Great White North, it was a nice way to ease back into Beijing life.

All four wines came from the West Coast and first up was Blasted Church Chardonnay, which had some citrus and sour apple on the nose, though it was a bit acidic for my liking. (How did the winery get its name? Sequoia owner Frank Siegel says that workers dynamited the church in the 1920s to loosen its nails and more easily dismantle and move it.) Sticking with the religious theme, we had a Church & State Merlot that featured raspberry, blackberry and other dark fruit aromas, followed by an Inniskillin Merlot, with a stronger bouquet, very fruity flavors and a hint of candy apple. Last up was the Sumac Ridge Cabernet, which seemed a bit bland to me, though to be fair I think the cheeses were overwhelming the wine by this point. Frank said it would go with wild game, such as moose or lamb, and conceded that street kebabs count as the latter. (By the way, attendee S. Heath said the best way to cook moose, in case you were wondering, is to get a no-bone cut, pierce it with a knife, stuff the hole with garlic, sear the meat shut, and layer it with bacon before cooking. This is the “The Jack Buck Way,” apparently after a big game hunter in Canada.) While all the wines received praise, the Chardonnay seemed to be the overall favorite, while I gave top marks to the Inniskillin.

As for the cheeses, the Moonstruck Beddis Blue was the best I’ve tasted since a Shropshire Blue at a Beijing Cheese Society event way back in November 2005. It was creamy, not too pungent, slightly nutty, and melted in the mouth. Jenn Hinkle, who is writing about wine in Beijing (more on this next issue) put it this way: “It tastes like a barn of cows smells.” (She meant that in a good way.) The other cheeses included a Comox Triple Cream Camembert (a mild, naturally pasteurized cheese with near-cheesecake texture), a Quebec five-year-old cheddar (good mouth-drying stuff and not too crumbly) and the rosemary-topped Salt Spring Island Chevre (a stinky, gooey goat cheese with a texture approaching yoghurt). Interestingly, attendee D. Heath said Salt Spring Island, off the coast of British Columbia, has been home to hippies and thus into organic food for 30 or 40 years, but is now becoming popular with the moneyed class and this is causing conflicts.

This tasting cost 160 kuai per person and was one of the regular Friday wine events organized in the Sanlitun branch of Sequoia Café (email frank.siegel@gmail.com to get on the mailing list). Kudos to Holden Jang, who not only designed Sequoia Cafe and Tim’s Texas BBQ, but also brought the wine and cheese from Canada.

I number among those poor souls without home Internet access. Getting online thus means packing the laptop, bundling up and heading *out there*. Here are three recent wireless experiences, followed by some favorite spots for surfing the Web. 

Vineyard Cafe
Given the coverage the free English-language magazines have heaped on this place, particularly for its “full English breakfast,” I recently popped in. The breakfast is indeed hearty, with egg, sausages, bacon (soft, not crispy), beans, mushrooms, tomato, two slices of toast, and choice of coffee or juice, though with a price tag of 65 kuai, another egg and bottomless java would be nice.

Vineyard Cafe is unpretentious and cozy, keeps the music at a reasonable volume, offers a good selection of cocktails, beer and wine, and had a strong wireless signal during my three-hour visit. The wildcard is the location. Some might get annoyed searching for a spot hidden in a hutong on a side street near Lama Temple. Others might see it as nicely secluded and rustic.

In any case, I experienced two cafes. The first was at brunch: crowded, comfortably noisy and saturated with a good vibe. The second was in late afternoon, when the human warmth (literally) was gone: the few customers shivered as the front door continually swung open and faced headaches as the back door slammed every 30 seconds or so. Management seems receptive, so odds are it will get a handle on this. A map to the cafe is available at www.vineyardcafe.cn, one of the town’s better bar blogs.

The Stone Boat
After a quick cocktail at The Press Club a few weeks back, I headed down the street, into Ritan Park and to The Stone Boat, where many a winter eve I spent two years ago as a newcomer to Beijing. I wanted to check it out after seeing an ad in that’s Beijing titled “Stone Boat Winter Myths.”

“Myth: Too cold. Reality: New heaters.” The Stone Boat was, indeed, much warmer than in previous winters, and a small foyer at the front provides two sets of sliding doors to keep in the heat, although a slight draft persists.

“Myth: No food. Reality: Homemade dumplings, soup, gluwein, etc.” True again. The vegetarian dumplings were maeyo, so I tried the beef ones (25 kuai per plate) and Boat Beef Noodles (25 kuai), both of which were fine.

“Myth: Dead. Reality: Parties. Stay tuned.” I was the only patron, but it was a Tuesday night and I was grateful this myth had yet to become reality.

Here are two more realities. Reality: I couldn’t get online. There was a signal, my computer apparently connected to it, and for an hour, I futilely tried to access Web sites while the staff smacked the wireless box, but no luck. Reality: entertainment is free. One employee repeatedly held a deck of cards above her head and let it drop onto a table, with a resounding crack, in attempts to get it to stand upright. Unfortunately, it got tiresome after the twentieth drop. In any case, I’m chalking up these last two realities to a bad night, as I’ve often found tranquility (and wireless) at Stone Boat.

Le Petit Gourmand
Longtime readers might remember my last story about this Sanlitun North spot included a bug falling out of a Parmesan shaker and onto my (up to then vegetarian) pizza. I’ve returned sporadically for coffee, but decided to give the food another shot after hearing the place has a new chef.

In my mind, any place positioned along the lines of The Bookworm, as is Le Petit Gourmand (LPG), should have wireless. Unfortunately, the only access I could get was via a weak intermittent signal from Bar Blu, one floor up. As I waited for my food, I mentioned this to Waitress One (W1), who motioned to an empty table 10 feet away. Hmmm. Perhaps she hadn’t understood, so I pointed to my computer screen and warped my face into a look of frustration. She nodded and zipped off, only to pass my table five or six times during the next 10 minutes, obviously having forgotten our conversation. No worries, I thought, I’ll go to the counter and ask Waitress Two (W2). I did, explaining verbally and in sign language, while she stared blankly at me. Perhaps she was considering my quandary, thought I. I thought wrong. W1 approached and asked W2 for two coffees, ending my brief relationship with W2 as she turned her attention elsewhere. I returned to my table and, seeing that W3 and W4 appeared as helpful as W1 or W2, decided to take action. As W1 passed, I caught her attention:

“Excuse me. I want to cancel my order.”
She looked confused.
“My order.”
“Water?”
“No, I want to cancel my order.”
“No water?”

She left and a few seconds later brought my club sandwich and soup (both passable). I made a few more attempts at getting a wireless signal, but it simply was not to be, which was too bad, because LPG has an okay drink, food and book selection and I would have stuck around all afternoon.

Here are some good spots for wireless, all of them in the Gongti area (I’m a homer when it comes to surfing the Web).

The Bookworm: The signal is generally good, but finding a seat can be tough, the music is sometimes too loud, and weird foreigners are attracted to the place like drunken moths to a Flaming Lamborghini. I tend to head there when I want to run into someone I know, crave potato gnocchi, feel like browsing books, or need to be near people who make me feel normal (“Did that guy just *snort* his sugar!?”).

Browns: While known for late-night shenanigans, this place is good for Web surfing. A strong signal, high ceilings, comfortable seats, and decent food and beer choices make it my default choice when The Bookworm is crowded. (Except tonight, as I write this newsletter, when the wireless is “broken” and a medical company is holding its year-end party - the emcee just yelled “wei” 20 times into the microphone as a test.)

Beer Mania: Wireless plus Belgian beer on draft at happy hour prices equals online fun.

Q Bar: I often meet acquaintances for an after-work drink at the Q and can check my email and sip a Horse Neck while I wait for them.

Sequoia Cafe: This place serves good coffee and sandwiches, even if the chairs are hard on the behind.

(From Beijing Boyce XXVIII, first emailed on December 23, 2006.)

Email: “Your beer gut must be even bigger than mine the amount of guzzling you must do in the interests of research. You should know that a hoary old favourite, John Bull Pub, will soon change its name and its style to Tim’s Texas Barbecue. [Owner] Frank [Siegel] is going to concentrate on his two (maybe more soon) Sequoia coffee houses. Sad, but inevitable.” - M.T.