Beijing Boyce

Welcome to Readers’ Writes week, starring the collective wisdom of 17 fellow bar-goers who answered my survey about their favorite Beijing drinking holes and the city’s general nightlife scene. They include men and women, span five decades in age, hail from four continents, and provide some appreciated insights. (Note: This first appeared in last week’s newsletter. To get the newsletter, send an email with “Eat, Drink and Be Merry” in the subject line to beijingboyce@yahoo.com.)

Without further ado…

DON ST. PIERRE, U.S. and “Canuck” citizen, founder of ASC Fine Wines, 21 years in Beijing and “only a little bit crazy”

Your favorite bar(s), and why
The Capital Club: It’s very relaxed, with many friends, and the best service in town. I helped design the bar.
The Pavillion: I love getting there early and chatting with my good friends Russell and Christine, even though neither of them drinks wine, and Christine not at all. Lots of old friends there, too, and it’s right on my way home. No detour necessary.
The Press Club bar in the St. Regis: It’s where I live and I can crawl home if I have to.
Capone’s: Strictly because of the singer Bobby Taylor, and Dougie, his piano player. My kind of music. Lots of Motown.

Your all-time favorite bar(s) and why
The Old Frank’s Place… friends, friends, friends
The Capital Club: Somebody asked about 10 years ago, “What time do you close?” and Dennis the bartender replied straight-faced, “When Don leaves.”

Thoughts on the local drinking scene
Generally speaking, a little low on class and I’m surprised so many people haven’t figured out that cheap drinks equals poor service. You can’t buy a Rolls Royce for the price of a Tianjin Diahatsu! The best days were the old days with my band of Beijing Jeep expats in places like Charlie’s Bar and The Gallery in the Lido. Lots of yelling and screaming and cursing, but we accomplished a lot.

OLLI ROBINSON, British, editor, 2 years

Favorites
The Saddle: I’ll always respect a place where the owner says you can carry on sleeping at the bar as long as you lock up when you leave. Plus, the fact the drinks are cheap, it’s unpretentious and the burritos aren’t half bad.
Red Ball: Beer + Football = : )
Luna: Great decor, good wine, friendly service - all in a nice part of town

All-time
Nanjie: The perfect place for any Beijing newcomer. Hot, steamy and sleazy. And cheap - very important for Beijing’s unemployed laowai community.
Yugong Yishan: Well… it’s Yugong Yishan.
Bed: In my opinion, the measure of a bar is if you could plonk it down in any city around the world and it would still be considered cool, even outside Beijing, you have yourself a fine establishment. Bed is one such place.
The Tree: I never had the fortune of frequenting the Hidden Tree, but its successor is a comfortable, sociable place to drink good beer.

The scene
While not being the most sophisticated night out, Beijing’s still… fun

EDDIE O

Favorites
My spot is Cheers. They don’t try and put on any airs, the prices are right and there is a good mix of live music and recorded stuff to request. Where else will they play the La Marseillaise, George Thorogood, Celine Dion and Frank Sinatra in the same hour while selling you a shot of Wild Turkey for 30 kuai?

JASON BEDFORD, Canadian, financial advisor, 3.5 years

Favorites
It’s hard to name one place because depending on my mood / situation, I normally vary between three places. When I’m with close friends or friends from out of town, I normally go with Suzie Wong’s: somewhat classy with an old Shanghai feel to it, drinks are good albeit pricey, and lots of women. If I am with colleagues, a date or just want a quiet drink, I’ll normally hit Centro (close by and the happy hour makes the prices pretty reasonable). If I’m feeling young and looking to get very inebriated, then Shooters is the place for me.

All-time
The recently torn down First Cafe. Made me feel like I was back home and the martinis are the best I have ever had. I was definitely sad to see it go… On that note, has anywhere managed to stand up to the plate and replace it?

The scene
I’ll go with a memory… In the two and a half years since South Street bar street was torn down, nothing new has ever quite been able to capture the same energy. The string of cheap bars there were so small that there was never enough room to seat the flock of people that would inevitably show up every weekend, forcing people outside onto the street, making every weekend seem like a little street party. Some of the old bars from there have reappeared (i.e. Pure Girl and Taniwha) but it’s just not the same…

Email: “Your comments on Rui Fu suggest powers of observation so weak that you would no doubt have trouble matching socks, finding Waldo or counting the fingers on one hand, let alone reviewing a club. “The main floor is divided into two large narrow rooms joined by an opening,” you claim. In fact, there is but one room. “…tables and chairs, then lounge areas, flow until they meet that opening, beyond which figures appear as silhouettes,” you claim. In fact, the “beyond” is actually the first room reflected in a mirror. Nice work, Sherlock Holmes. If you could learn to develop some characters, you might have a future in fiction. (By the way, I loved your “plush karaoke, generic hotel casino, and modernized opium den” reference — kisses!)“ - B. Boyce

BB: I thought I’d beat someone to the punch on that one. Rui Fu does, in fact, have one room. In my own defense, I’m easily distracted, the mirror on the far side is *really* shiny, and it does look like a passageway. Here’s the worst part: Around 10 PM one night, I was writing a review of Rui Fu based on a single one-hour visit and felt that was unfair, so I decided to delay the newsletter, threw on some decent clothes, headed over there, ended up taking to owner Henry Li for an hour, got a better feel for the club, and then came back and ADDED the part about two rooms. Yes, in this case, more research resulted in greater inaccuracy. Go figure.

Email: “W Sports Bar does not have a pool table.” - W. Thomas

b: I was wrong (again). Last issue, I wrote that W has a table hockey game buried amid enough stuff to make for a most excellent yard sale, including, “[a] ping pong table, dartboard, big-screen TV, pool table, art, grand piano, foosball table, etc.”

My bad: mae yo pool table.

Nevertheless, I won’t retract the ensuing comment: “Is there anywhere else in town where you might simultaneously hear “Who’s serve?,” “Bull’s eye!,” “I’ll have two beers, please,” “Eight ball, corner pocket,” and “This is simply too Dadaist for my taste,” all while someone chops out Mozart and a Formula 1 race shows?”

Even without a table, that “eight ball” comment could still easily be heard from a confused ping pong player, coverage of the world pool championships on the big screen, or… actually, forget it, there’s no way I’m going to make a cheap baggy pants joke.

Email: “You’ve listed Club Football as one of our editor’s picks - NO! It’s the unique RED BALL BAR - can you issue a correction?” - H. La

BB: I was wrong again (again). (People should be used to this by now, but no, in flood the emails.) This time, an eagle-eyed staffer from that’s Beijing (TBJ) pointed out that I listed Club Football, rather than Red Ball Bar, as an honorable mention as bar of the year.

(”I love the Ball because it’s so unique and different. There’s a smashing atmosphere, the staff are so friendly and helpful, it’s superb value [where else can you get a bottle/carton of decent wine for RMB 50?] and it’s so different from any other bar I’ve been to,” he/she enthused.)

Fair enough. Correction issued. To err is human, they say, as TBJ itself showed by not giving a single editor’s pick to Browns, even though that place won the popular vote, is frequented by other bar owners and employees… well, you know the story (and yes, that was a cheap shot).

Aside 1: Most of my British friends hate Browns. They disdainfully describe it as typical of this or that horrible bar in London, Muckchester, Corkingham or wherever they call home. Message received — about a million times so far. And I’m sure the Beijing natives living in the Isles aren’t overly fond of the Chinese restaurants there. Such is life. The thing is, we’re not in Britain, nor do most of us hail from there, and Browns is what it is — a place for good, clean fun. Where else will you find seven young guys raucously celebrating a birthday while nearby two couples in their seventies happily boogie to eighties tunes? Not cool, you say? Well, some people dislike pretentiousness or simply aren’t trendy, thus we need Browns, the great melting pot of bars in this city. So, for the love of Buddha, and Ben Elton, please stop the hating! Pretty please? Pretty please with Boddington foam and frozen blood pudding shavings on top?

Aside 2: The mainstream media must be disheartened when amateurs such as yours truly turn on their powers of perception and score a major news scoop. Take my expose on the White Man Overbite dancing epidemic at several Sanlitun hot spots a while back. The China Daily, Wall Street Journal and their kin completely missed that one. Then there’s my most recent scoop: uncovering a direct link between eyeglass-wearing styles and bar success. The evidence accumulated during my lengthy investigation would fill multiple volumes, but let me present two pieces. First, a recent TBJ story about its bar awards ceremony shows not one, not two, but three victorious owners wearing eyeglasses atop their heads, as though they had visually challenged hair follicles that were looking at the ceiling and possibly to a vote-producing deity beyond. Second, numerous other winning owners not pictured in the story were spotted at the ceremony wearing glasses in a similar manner. The link is obvious, but what of its significance? While it is difficult to quantify the positive effects of, for example, a pair of Ray-Ban bifocal sunglasses on revenue, my guess is 22.7 percent, give or take 0.3 percent. (Rose-colored lenses and those for nearsightedness would obviously have less impact.) Contrast this to bar owners who wear baseball hats backwards: I estimate that such low-brows typically see their businesses go bankrupt in a matter of weeks and also stand a fifty-fifty chance of spontaneously combusting. The lesson is simple: bar success is yours if you keep your glasses pointing upward and keep your ball caps pointing forward, and ideally do both (glasses over caps, of course). And remember, you heard it here first.

Email: “It is tres terrible to hear about the Big Easy. It easily had some of the best jazz and singers since my days on

before heading for Vietnam in ‘67. Are they going to open somewhere else?” - J.W.

BB: That’s a really good question and I don’t have a clue as to the answer. Maybe The Big Easy will relocate beside the new Latinos! Anyone out there have some inside information?

(From Beijing Boyce XXIII, first emailed on August 31, 2006)

China Daily reports that Louisiana-themed The Big Easy will be chai’d on Sunday. Chaoyang Park authorities voided the bar’s 13-year lease, signed in 1998, in order to make space for a “peace plaza,” although they didn’t reveal whether this will be a government or commercial venture, states the newspaper. The creative layout, spirited music and Bloody Marys of The Big Easy will be missed. / Before losing its trio of capable bartenders earlier this year, Midnight packed in partiers and pumped out 50-kuai cocktails. Now, a signboard out front advertises 10-kuai drinks, including — and some might prefer this one with two paramedics, stomach pump and stretcher – Gin and Coke. / Browns, bursting at the seams last Saturday night, smartly anchored an ice-filled claw-footed bathtub of bottled beer just inside the door and thus siphoned off some of the thirsty patrons teeming at the bar. (Suggestion: Sell bottled water from the tub, too.) / Berber N, home of tasty kebabs before construction forced its closure on Sanlitun North earlier this year, has reopened across from Tongli Studios. Never have skewered chicken butts been more savory. / The last time I saw words such as “closed for maintenance work,” they were plastered on the door at First Cafe, which shortly thereafter pounded into coaster-size bits. That is, until Tuesday — and I hope it is coincidence — when I spotted them in neat longhand beside the entrance to Mojito, a fairly new place that has Beijing’s only draft Weihenstephaner. (Could a beer have a better name for the China market? The first half sounds delightfully Mandarin and the second evokes the Deutschland.) / Contrary to popular belief, Beijing does have table hockey, courtesy of W Sports Bar, where it is buried amid the ping pong table, dartboard, big-screen TV, pool table, art, grand piano, foosball table, etc. Is there anywhere else in town where you might simultaneously hear “Who’s serve?”, “bull’s eye!”, “I’ll have two beers, please”, “eight ball, corner pocket” and “this is simply too Dadaist for my taste,” all while someone chops out Mozart and a Formula 1 race shows? / Deep in Sanlitun South, a new bar is opening on the second floor of the building that Beer Mania calls home. With W Sports Bar, Q Bar and Yes Club nearby, a new party zone seems to be forming. / Speaking of Q Bar: one crane, four hours, and a dozen people. That’s about what it took to get a five-meter tree and some stone flower beds atop this bar’s increasingly green sixth-floor deck a few weeks ago. Fortunately, should the day come, it will only take a few seconds to get them back down. / With its latest Chicago blues act having returned stateside, Icehouse, the bar part of RBL, now features a mix of local and foreign talent in the form of the Rhythm Dogs (Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays). Meanwhile, the employee turnstile spins on as Chef Dan Segal, who joined RBL this year after working at the former Louisiana restaurant in the Hilton, has left for Hong Kong. / Stone Boat continues with its funky live music line-up. The next three Fridays feature Enfants Terribles (electro-jazz, August 11), Muwen (traditional instruments, August 18) and Hanggai (”Mongol roots,” August 25), while Panjir Trio plays Saturdays all month. / Speaking of which, shortly after announcing the readers’ choices for its recent bar and club awards, that’s Beijing (TBJ) published its “editor’s picks.” Top spot of the year honors went to Stone Boat (good ambience and music, though the drinks and service are spotty), with honorable mentions to Area (was it on the ballot?) and Club Football (known primarily for its soccer pitches) [Ed. The bar was in fact Redball]. Nothing against those places, but I don’t think collectively they had the impact of Browns. It exploded onto the bar scene this year, is busy beyond belief, appeals to most every age group, nationality and profession, influences and attracts as customers other bar owners and employees, offers decent food and a good draft beer selection, and, last but not least, won the readers’ vote. Love it or hate it, the place has made a mark. By the way, TBJ deserves kudos for organizing these awards. Cynics claim the magazine uses them to placate sponsors, but since each of the 20 categories has one winner and seven losers, more clients are likely to be upset than pleased. (And if you don’t believe it, then a band of TBJ staffers will roll up their gargantuan 250-page magazines and knock you about like a pinata. Or, maybe not.) / Fromage fans must be quick on the return key trigger when they get Beijing Cheese Society invites. Next week’s California-themed event at Palais sold out in a few hours. / Correction: Last issue, I wrote that 5:19 Bar and Grill was starting a darts league. In fact, it is one of the hosts of the Beijing International Darts League, which welcomes new teams and venues (email Chris “Elvis” Milward at commish@beijing-darts.com).

(From Beijing Boyce XXII, first emailed on August 12, 2006)

Looking for your World Cup fix? The Pavillion and Frank’s Place promise large outdoor screens, while Club Football, Red Ball, John Bull Pub, The Den, Goose and Duck (see below), W Sports Bar, Mojito, and everyone else and their goalkeeper will also be showing games. Is anyone out there (besides me) looking for a place to instead watch the NBA finals? / Beer Mania has added Russian brews to its mostly Belgian menu. Canadian beers will soon be stocked, says management, meaning it’s time to brush up on Canuck-isms, such as “two-four,” “toque,” “take off” and “LCBO.” / Meanwhile, Browns has added Beck’s (Germany) and Stella Artois (Belgium) to its draft beer selection. / A friendly place with good live Xinjiang music, Cheers has a spiffy new look, though management has maintained the happy hour: two-for-one until 10 PM, which translates into 10-kuai Qingdao drafts. (A tip of the shot glass to BB reader Eddie O, for buying the place a bottle of Wild Turkey: “If you’re a Christian, you spread the Gospel. If you’re a bourbon lover, you spread the Bird,” he writes.) / Speaking of which, after visiting Cheers, I had the munchies and headed for nearby Saddle. Given my previous experiences with poor service and fapiao troubles there, it was no surprise that I could not procure a quick burrito as the staff closed up. I took my money instead to Fish Nation, where I soon had some tasty eats. / Dave McCullough, the Grand Poohba of 5:19, noted on that’s Beijing’s forums that, “PiliPili quietly reopened… It looks absolutely gorgeous inside.” / Finally, this issue was pieced together fairly quickly, since I’ve been extra busy at work, have guests in town, and did not have my notes while putting together the final draft. My apologies if it goes down a bit rougher than usual.

(From Beijing Boyce XVII, first emailed on May 27, 2006)