Beijing Boyce

Bling (map): I didn’t make it for the Playboy dancers – I find the stage versions are never as good as the books, uh, I mean, magazines. But an SMS from a fellow bar-goer stated that the dance floor was full of “Russians boogying to ‘Beautiful Girl.’ It’s like Bling and Chocolate have swapped intended clientele”, while another stated that the dancers are “really quite nice. And they claim to have made their wacky go-go costumes themselves.” Since I make my own Speedos, I guess I missed a chance to meet some soul mates…

Le Petit Gourmand (map): Given this place has finally uploaded some new music, and hopefully discarded that CD with a dozen versions of “My Way“, I have renewed hope for world peace, for an end to global warming, and for public relations to send out bar announcements sans smiley faces and multiple exclamation marks. By the way, LPG’s sandwiches, including the club pictured above (RMB44), are tasty, good value, and come with fries and salad.

Union Bar & Grille (map): Despite plans each weekend “to boldy go where no man has gone before”*, I find myself at Union at least once for brunch. The food is consistently good, whether in terms of the basic breakfast, the eggs benedict, or the omelets. And at RMB45-RMB55 per plate, with RMB20 for bottomless coffee, I find it among the best-value brunches in town. Now, if they would only work on the service. (* Star Trek is being released in Beijing this weekend and I had to get in at least one reference. Now, which bar is going to take advantage of this momentous event and come up with a Tribble burger?)

Danger Doyle’s (map): Love the Monday free pizza deal (management says it gave out 85 pies last night), like the beer selection and the rooftop, and I might someday enjoy the ladies night if there were more females there than at Destinations on a given night (true, I arrived with DJ Chunky around 1 AM, but still…). DD’s also has the NBA channel which means people can catch basketball games that air after 10 AM (that’s when the place opens).

Note: I have also caught NBA games at The Goose and Duck (open 24 hours, though the slingbox feed for the last game was choppy), The Rickshaw (which has the NBA channel and is open early mornings), and The Den (which airs the games shown on CCTV and Bensports, though the latter service is unfortunately down at the moment).

Maxim’s Solana (map): I went to the launch of online vino retailer mywineshop on Sunday. The cool weather made that new hedged-in patio an enjoyable place to try a half-dozen wines and mow down a heap of appetizers – the locally produced foie gras was particularly good.

The Den (map): Same old, same old. By the way, I am not a big fan of interventions, but if anyone sees me going solo on The Den deep-fried combo again, please get out the tranquilizer gun.

ex-Cross Club (map): This spot is on the verge of reopening and I hope the decor inside is a few steps above the rainbow colored lights outside. People tell me the guys behind Cappuccino, the currently gutted bar that is on the northernmost  corner of Sanlitun Bar Street and best known for oudoor lights that emulate the LED equalizer lights on a stero, are involved. Can anyone confirm this?

The Irish Volunteer (map): See here.

There is no rest for the wicked, they say, and the same holds true for the Beijing bar scene. (This raises theological questions that would best be discussed over a few pints.) Here are some changes taking place on the Sanlitun South route that connects Q Bar and The Rickshaw:

W Sports and Music Bar and Restaurant (map) – talk about a wordy name – is gutted and under renovations. This place has had a bit of identity crisis (see W: Spaghetti with ping pong balls on top), so hopefully what comes next is more focused and takes advantage of that excellent patio. (I will miss that sign out front that says, “Probably the best Swedish food in Beijing.”)

Beer Mania (map), which often flies under the radar but draws a strong regular crowd, has added a new wooden deck for those who like to enjoy a Belgian beer in the great outdoors.

Expect a new bar to open in the old Cross Club (map) space in about ten days. I hope the rainbow-colored lights that rim the windows are not indicative of the decor inside.

Finally, while nothing is confirmed,there is a good chance that some eateries will open in the former Pink Loft space and provide late-night bar-goers with much-needed additional food options in the area. (The new Pink Loft (map) is in the former Browns space.)

I’ll have a post up shortly on some new places coming up in the Workers Stadium area…

After our recent Go North Campaign, The Cellar Rat stuck closer to home and toured local spots. I decided to give an award to each place. (Note: This is part one of two.)

Rock n’ Roll: best use of red light and industrial design to provide a feel that is one part Cold War, one part Blade Runner, one part Logan’s Run and one part Mad Max (or maybe that’s the Budweiser talking)
Sunday night, 9:30 PM, most people are home getting ready for the work week, no? No. One recent Sunday, at least, people were packed into Rock n’ Roll to enjoy a cross-talk performance, dance music and plenty of the “Champagne of beers” – Budweiser.

You get to Rock n’ Roll through an entrance that features a rippled cement wall traversed by water and illuminated with red light. If that doesn’t scare you off, enter the cargo elevator and exit to a dim lobby dominated by concrete, stainless steel, a turnstile, and more red light. (This seems like a perfect set for a movie about foreign bar-goers who head out in search of a night of fun but instead find themselves drugged and harvested of organs, but I digress.) After paying the entrance fee (25 kuai), expect the metal detector treatment if you’re not checking your bag (2 kuai).

Inside, the seating is largely a curving mass of bar stools, tables, and lounge areas facing the dance floor. A warm six-pack of Budweiser and a fruit plate seem common fare, with a bottle of Bud at 25 kuai. The crowd tended to be twenty-something, but included numerous older patrons.

A cross-talk was in full play as we arrived, to the approval of the patrons, and then music began throbbing and the dance floor filled. Given there were but a handful of foreigners amid a few hundred locals, I suggested The Cellar Rat do us proud and bust out his infamous trademark moves, including the White Man’s Overbite, but he declined.

Cross: the most misleading signage on Sanlitun South
The large sign on the façade of Cross features the words “French style” and a photo of an attractive Caucasian woman seated at a table while two men look admiringly at her from a distance. It says one thing to me: massage. Actually, that’s what a sign says below it – “Massage – B1″ so finding a nice wine bar inside was a surprise.

The Cellar Rat described the interior as French colonial, which meant lots of plush chairs, dark woods, elaborate candlesticks, tan and chocolate-colored textiles, and a palm tree that starts on the main floor and rises into an empty space around which wraps a second floor balcony.

The lighting is dim, the staff is efficient, and this night saw numerous couples enjoying a Sunday of wining and dining. The wine list is extensive with plenty of choice, from Grand Cru to less wallet-punishing labels. Whisky starts at 38 kuai, cocktails are in the 50-kuai area.

A female singer and a male pianist performed standard fare, from Teresa Deng to Mariah Carey and The Beatles. The only downside: when the pianist went vocalist and massacred Casablanca. Again, it was a nice surprise to find a place to enjoy some wine and candlelit interaction.

Yes: best use of chemicals for crowd control
Just up the street and around the corner from Beer Mania, Yes also drew a large crowd on this Sunday. This is a standard bar / club: a long oval bar, lots of table seating, a dance floor, and a more exclusive area in back, with plenty of electric blues, candy apple reds, lime greens and ambers for those attracted to lights. The crowd tended to be young and the place apparently doubles as singles hangout (there’s a “partner wanted” board out front).

I’m not keen on the staff uniforms. The pink and white pajama / bowling shirt getups worn by the floor staff are okay, I guess, but having bar staff in sleeveless schoolboy outfits is a bit off (especially if they’re working hard and getting sweaty).

Our exit came shortly after the flair bartending show began. We saw the staff rolling up flammable materials, adding lighter fluid, and sticking them in bottles. Once those wicks were lit, we quickly called it a night before the ensuing cloud of gaseous fumes overtook us…

Note: Check back for part 2 of this pub crawl, in which The Cellar Rat lights himself on fire, throws up on a bar owner’s pet Chihuahua, and decides to have his two competing personalities engage in bilingual cross-talk in order to amuse a nearby table of Slovenian supermodels. (Actually, none of those things happened, but I thought a teaser was in order. However, if anyone knows of Slovenian supermodels that require amusing, please email me at beijingboyce@yahoo.com.)