The ‘Want Some Stuff, Man?’ Contest: ‘Yeah, I want some [fill in blank].’

July 23, 2012 - Contests - 34 comments

(Winner of Name That ‘Tun contest to be announced shortly.)

The stuff that gets you sauced. (funnycrave.com)

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Visit Sanlitun at night, and appear as if there is at least a .01 percent chance you might want some “stuff”, and you will likely get a pitch from one of many mobile foreign salesmen keen to provide his supply to your potential demand.

However, if you are like me, you are not interested in such stuff, thus the nonstop proposals get tiresome. I mean, I do want stuff, I just don’t want the stuff they are selling.

If such entrepreneurs want my hard-earned RMB, here is stuff they should stock, all of which they could carry a supply of in a large pocket or a small knapsack:

  • Packets of Taco Bell hot sauce. I love it on top of scrambled eggs and Gung Ho pizzas but can only get it via friends returning from the U.S. and Canada. I’d happily buy.
  • Arm & Hammer baking soda toothpaste. It is available in a few stores in Beijing but I would be willing to redirect my purchasing power to the smaller businessman.
  • Miniature sewing kits. I only remember I need one when I am at home and need to add a button. Too late! A gentle, “Want a sewing kit, man?”, would trigger my memory and generate a sale.
  • Single-serving vacuum-sealed packs of Tim Horton’s coffee. When returning home after a big night out, I would buy a few to ensure a nice cup of java the next morning.

No doubt, many people reading this post can think of other stuff. So, why not a contest?

Leave a comment by 5 PM next Friday (July 27) and tell us what stuff you want.

I’ll randomly pick one comment as the winner of a 750 ml bottle of the 100th anniversary “Striding Man” edition of Johnnie Walker Black (hat tip to ksquare) and his and hers caps from the newly opened restaurant Uncle Otis. And I’ll possibly add more stuff.

Want some stuff?

About the author

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