Beijing Boyce

What do you mean by 'comb'? (cousinavi.wordpress.com)

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Grinders is not only the latest place to start a pub quiz but also the first in recent memory to book it on a Saturday night (8 PM), that time of the week when the only questions I want to hear are “Gin or vodka?” and “Olive or lemon twist?” Anyway, this means Shuangjing now has a pair of weekly brain-teasers given that The Brick holds a quiz each Wednesday (9 PM).

I find quizzes as much fun as shaving with a rusty vegetable peeler or debating salesmanship tactics with a persistent ‘lady bar’ tout but some readers value the chance to spend all night arguing with teammates over what answer to list in the hope of winning a six-pack of beer and bragging rights that they know more about TV commercials, bad 80s music and cricket history than anyone else in the room

Attitude aside – and I blame it on the five cups of coffee I have had today – I try to help readers of this blog and thus am listing this Saturday’s first round questions and answers, all of which have a Canadian angle since I figure that will guarantee they get included by quiz master / China Radio International celebrity / fellow Canuck Paul James. Here they are…

Answers

1. Beating the back bacon
2. Celine Dion (if we all sign the petition)
3. The 41-Year-Old Virgins
4. Never
5. True. No, wait: false
6. Yes, Wonder Bread was invented in 1920 and the Eskimo Pie in 1921.
7. Could we please go the next question?
8. John ‘Eh’ Macdonald
9. You be the beach and I’ll comb you.
10. One
11. Lee Aaron, no, no
12. They’re both fucking close to water.
13. Screech farts
14. No, I’m pretty sure it’s screech farts.
15. Canadian Club

• Bonus: True

Questions

1. What is an alternative way of saying ‘manhandling the moose’?
2. Which one of these singers is not Canadian: Bryan Adams, Leonard Cohen, Celine Dion, Nelly Furtado, Avril Lavigne, Sarah McLaughlin or Alanis Morissette?
3. What is the nickname of the Vancouver Canucks hockey team, which was founded in 1970 and has never won the Stanley Cup?
4. When will they win the Stanley Cup?
5. The fabled gables were green in the 1908 Canadian novel Anne of Green Gables. But in reality, the Anne who inspired the story contracted an illness due a diet that almost solely consisted of two new-fangled inventions — Wonder Bread and Eskimo pies — and herself turned green. True or false?
6. Are you sure?
7. Well, aren’t you clever?
8. What is the name of the first Canadian prime minister (bonus point for giving it a Bob and Doug McKenzie twist)?
9. What is the one line that Relic should have said to Nick (see photo above), but never did, on The Beachcombers, the Canadian TV show about driftwood collectors in British Columbia?
10. What should be the official all-time quota for the entire known universe for TV shows about driftwood collectors in British Columbia?
11. Who in Canadian rock music history is known as the Metal Queen? Was she actually made of metal? Did she turn green?
12. How is making love in a canoe similar to American beer?
13. What is that awful smell in Newfoundland?
14. It’s not loneliness?
15. What drink does a baby seal never order at a bar?

• Bonus question: At least half of the goals scored by Wayne Gretzky could legitimately be described as “kind of lucky”. True or false?

Good luck, people…

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The Butcher Steakhouse burst onto the scene by offering its massive gut-busting burger for free — if you managed to down it in one sitting. Now TBS has seared its last steak / is chopped liver / has been gutted / is closed. While this place had potential, and a nice deck on which to chill out, it had an awful lot of seats to fill and struggled with the service and food. That downstairs Japanese restaurant, which opened just a few months, is also closed. This place has been a merry-go-round since longstanding tenant Cappuccino left — maybe it is time for a comeback?

More restaurants for the grinder.