Beijing Boyce

I should get to more hutong bars but: a) they tend to be far away, b) they tend to be hard to find, and c) I’m lazy. This weekend I made two journeys to the Gulou area. I met a lot of interesting people as well as a smattering of those Too Cool for School types who think hanging out in “the hutongs” means they are getting a “real” Beijing experience even though: a) most of the bars in that area did not exist a few years ago, b) having drunk foreigners roam those streets is also a relatively new phenomenon, and c) the average Chinese living in that area would not  pay RMB20 for a bottle of Tsingtao. (And yeah, I’m grouchy today and need more coffee.) Anyway, some places visited there and about town over the weekend:

12SQM: This bar is most fun when: a) owner Joseph is there, b) we can access the play list by iPhone to request his favorite song, “Informer” by Snow*, and c) there is cold Cooper’s Pale Ale. Only c) applied on this visit as I wasn’t with anyone with an iPhone and Joseph was off that day (probably making Vegemite or watching cricket or something). By the way, this place is much better than last year given the addition of the toilet (no more chilly jaunts to that local loo).

Gulou 121: I went to see Kaiser Kuo and friends cover Rush tunes (they didn’t do Tom Sawyer, but I knew they wouldn’t in advance, so I hummed it on the way). This is an earthy and modestly sized bar that is tightly packed with wood furniture and has a menu that includes RMB20 Budweiser. It, too, has a loo, not to mention a second floor.

The Box: My first stop at this Gulou bar since the early days. Several friends recommended the food so I tried the Buffalo chicken burger (RMB35). The sauce is pungent but I like it that way, though the bun might work better if lightly grilled or toasted, and I plan to try the wings and poutine on my next visit. (The biggest downside is the heavy cooking smells wafting in from the kitchen.) Beer starts at RMB15 for Harbin, while Moosehead is RMB28. The place now has hockey jerseys and photos of Canadian icons on the walls, giving it a homier feel, though I’m not sure it can be considered a “Canadian bar” until it hosts a euchre tournament (hint, hint). By the way, if you need to use the toilet, you’ll have to head to the public facilities across the street.

Bed: A dependable stop after all of these years. With a see-through covering and numerous space heaters, the courtyard is accessible and comfortable in the winter. Sometimes it is good when things stay the same and this applies to the layout at Bed, with the bar and lounge up front and the bedrooms, courtyard, and small bar in back. But this place could do with a more interesting wine list and the Old Fashioned (RMB50) was average at best.

Siif: A somewhat dingy three floor-joint with eclectic design elements—sections of the floor are glass (which means you probably don’t want to wear a skirt upstairs or think you are picking your nose in private downstairs), there are rope “handrails” for the stairs, and the decoration includes everything from graffiti to plush toys. The slightly musty basement serves as DJ, dance, and foosball area, the main floor holds the bar, a pool table, and a small lounge area, and the upstairs has a rec room feel. It worked well as a party space (we were there to celebrate DZ’s birthday), but if my weak Jack Coke (RMB35) was representative of the mixed drinks, you should stick to the local beer at RMB15. (Siif is a combination of the French word for if, “si”, and “if”.)

2 Kolegas: I went to catch the final RandomK(e) show (I have listened to this band’s CD more than that of any other in Beijing: maybe I have a thing for air sirens). I like the vibe at 2 Kolegas, especially in the summer, and it is easier to reach from Workers Stadium by taxi than it is Nanluoguxiang. In any case, a fine final gig by RandomK(e), with plenty of good visuals and sound effects, including not one, but two air sirens. A Tsingtao is RMB15.

Paddy O’Shea’s: This place always seems to be packed. When I asked co-owner and manager Karl Long about this, he simply said, “I’m a businessman, Boyce, I’m a businessman.” One reason might be the effort the place makes for sports fans. In addition to showing rugby and soccer, Paddy’s made a group of U.S. college football fans happy by getting Saturday night’s Ohio-Michigan game up and running. The pub has had a “grow a mustache” campaign all month to raise awareness of cancer.

Fubar: Been here several times lately not only because it is the closest bar to my house but also because you can now get a Dark and Stormy made with Gosling’s rum and Gosling’s ginger beer (try the beer on its own if you are looking for something nonalcoholic). Co-owner Chad Lager got on the decks last night and even sang the chorus of Roxanne. But confiding he used to practice singing Loverboy’s The Kid Is Hot Tonight in front of the mirror as a youngster? Too much info, Lager, too much info.

* To be confirmed

Look for the main floor of Kokomo to have a new look when it reopens as Mo Lounge in the next few weeks. If the artist renderings are any indication, the earthy vibe will be replaced for something more sophisticated: expect richer and darker colors, dimmer lighting, and a three-sided bar and lounge areas. (I will always have fond Kokomo memories due to: 1) the excellent Olympics parties there and 2) the trials and tribulations of co-owner Bill Isler as he tried to figure out why all the fish kept dying in the tanks in those early days. My guess: they were getting into that potent Navy Grog.)

That is only half the news at Kokomo: Isler and partner El-Mar also say they have taken over Bambu BBQ one floor down and will soon open a pizzeria there called Kung Fu. (For those seeking a link to Gung Ho! and Bang! Bang, look elsewhere, as there is no exclamation mark in the name.) Here’s my request: please set up a stand on the first floor and sell some of that pizza by the slice. Sanlitun is long overdue for such a spot.

Finally, the first floor of the Saddle will soon reopen. Don’t expect a new version of former sibling establishment The Rickshaw. This place looks more like the Saddle’s second floor (restaurant seating, table settings) though it will focus on gourmet tacos and some other Mexican dishes. More on the opening date and the place’s official name once I get word.

If you have Frank's, you gotta have Bean's.

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I started this installment of the Give a Crap Report series months ago but kind of got busy.  As usual, it covers what would happen if only bars and restaurants listened to me, me, me. (Maybe these reports need tag lines like The Crappiest Report Yet or Six Degrees of Crap. I’ll work on it.) Here we go…

41. Q Bar would organize a speed-dating event using its Q Boxes. Put a pair of ladies in each of the six boxes and have pairs of gents do a circuit–each stop lasts ten minutes and includes one shooter. The sparks should be flying after an hour or two.

42. Modo would change at least some of the sixteen bottles in its card-based wine machine. C’mon guys, I’ve already tried many of those wines four or five times and even my ex-boss from Shanghai has gone through them twice.

43. This comes courtesy of noted linguist Shannon R: He requests that Fubar regularly clean the button for its secret door given how many people are coming from the toilets and, after deciding it is too troublesome to wash their hands, pressing that button to re-enter the place. (By the way, this is reason 742 to not share free peanuts in bars.)

44. Speaking of Fubar, here are two more: 1) If the place is going to call itself a speakeasy and do special glasses, how about one in the shape of a claw-footed bathtub that holds a liter of gin (or gin tonic) and has a tiny tap to facilitate self-pouring at the table? 2) Since the RMB1 monthly parties are no more, how about some other kind of monthly event, such as a FU-ll Moon Party?

45. Someone would open a place beside Frank’s called Bean’s. (I wrote that before John Harkness from Goose and Duck took over Frank’s Place with his plans to rename the venue Johnny Duck’s.)

46. Someone would take all the trendy features of bar and restaurant names over the past decade, such as the “i” and “my” phenomena, the “@” sign, and the recent fascination with exclamation marks (Refresh! Gung Ho! Bang Bang!) to make one SuperBad name. Like iPizza@Sanlitun! or myIce!Cre@m! or iBangHo! We might need a smiley face, too. A blinking one.

47. Speaking of pizza, someone needs to open a hole-in-the-wall pizza-by-the-slice joint in Sanlitun. How can serving slabs of piping hot pie from 8 PM to 4 AM not result in an oven full of money? The place would probably make a profit just off me.

48. Still on pizza, Bang! Bang! should start some weekly specials that are in keeping with the place’s name. I’m thinking Pfft! Pfft! two-for-one beer night, Pop! Pop! wine deal night, and Ouch! Ouch! piping-hot-pizza-stuck-to-the-roof-of-my-mouth night.

49. Refresh! would café sell its coffee in pill form. This stuff is rocket fuel and if they could concentrate a cup into one capsule, one per day would keep me going.

50. Wait staff should never, ever pass a full glass of water, coffee, soda, beer, or any other liquid over an open laptop unless doing so would save the world from a meteor strike or some other tragedy. Ever….

Got some ideas on how to improve the scene? Leave them in the comments section or send them to me at beijingboyce (at) yahoo.com. If I use your idea, I’ll give you… um… I’ll give you a big virtual hug.

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See also:
Give a Crap Report V: Blue Frog, Erlitun, Le Petit Gourmand, Prima Taste, and more
Give a Crap Report IV: Tun, Er, Hex, All-Star, Stadium, and more
Give a Crap Report III: This blog goes ballistic
Give a Crap Report II: Tun, Q, Maison Boulod, Press Club Bar, and more
Give a Crap Report I: Bookworm, Klubb Rouge, Maggie’s, All Star, Luga’s, and more

Two-floor cafe and grill Casa Brasil, headed by Daniel Aldana of Alameda fame, has opened in the former Sequoia Cafe / Garden Books space across from the Brazilian embassy. (This space also housed Tim’s Texas Bar-B-Q and John Bull Pub in the past.) The first-floor cafe opened late last week while the second-floor grill opens tonight at 6 PM. The menu, which Aldana says will be expanded, currently includes everything from salads to steaks while the barbecue will be RMB88 during lunch and RMB168 during dinner. The beverages include Brazilian favorite, Caipirinha.

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I don’t know my pintxos from my txakoli so I joined a tasting of Basque tapas and wine at Migas restaurant in Nali Patio last night. I have been to Migas for a dinner, a night of drinking with my ex-boss, and The Beijinger anniversary party, and enjoyed myself each time. I like the rooftop (it works for everything from a large party to a romantic rendezvous), the design of the restaurant (although it does come off as a bit cold), and the food (I remember the suckling pig and apple risotto best).

Tapas in the Basque region are known as pintxos, a word that refers to the toothpick or skewer stuck into each serving, and are typical pub food there. We tried about a dozen kinds (see full list below), with my favorites being the Spanish sausage on toast, the Spanish omelet (whether filled with tuna salad or crab salad), and the crab salad on toast. We washed them down with wine from MPC. Fresh ingredients plus generous serving sizes plus superb presentation mean good tapas times. (Standing about and sampling them made me think this would be a good informal office party option.)

I also had an interesting discussion with Alejandro Sánchez, co-owner of Spanish restaurant Niajo on the third floor of Nali Patio. Niajo is known for paella, including seafood and chicken-vegetable options, and I suggested a breakfast version: rice topped with back bacon, ham, sausage, egg, and potato.  I didn’t get much support from the Spanish delegation. Fair enough. But then Sanchez tells me about a Spanish hamburger he makes. Hey guys, if you can have a Spanish hamburger, I can have a Canadian paella! (Did I mention it includes  maple syrup?) I was going to push this point until I remembered: 1) these guys come from a country where they stick swords into bulls and 2) someone recently described me as “beefy”.

Anyway, last night’s event cost RMB130 and is the first in a series of Spanish regional food tastings Migas is planning. (There was also a dinner–this one focused on the food of Aragon–to mark the return to Beijing of chef Aitor Olabegoya though I don’t know how anyone had room for more food after the tapas tasting.)

The pintxos we tried (list supplied by Mai Quant of Migas):

• Pintxo de tortilla con berengena / Spanish omelet with eggplant
• Pintxo de tortilla con pimiento asado al Josper / Spanish omelet with “piquillo” red pepper
• Pintxo de pulpo con alioli / 0ctopus with “alioli” sauce on toast
• Pintxo de huevo relleno con atún / stuffed egg with tuna on toast
• Pintxo de Chistorra / Spanish sausage on toast
• Pintxo de Morcilla con espuma de piquillo / fried pig’s blood with rice and red pepper foam on toast
• Pintxo de txaca / crab salad on toast
• Tortilla rellena de txaca / Spanish omelet filled with tuna salad
• Tortilla rellena de atun / Spanish omelet filled with crab salad
• Rollito de cabalacin relleno con bacon, mozarella, langostino en tempura / tempura zucchini roll stuffed with mozzarella, bacon and shrimp

(Photos courtesy of Migas)

No mud at The Volunteer (photo: torontoist.com)

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After that heartbreaking “too many men on the field” penalty against Saskatchewan in last year’s Grey Cup, this year’s rematch between the Roughriders and Montreal Alouettes for the Canadian Football League championship should be a good one. You can catch the 98th Grey Cup at The Irish Volunteer from 7 AM on Monday. As usual, the “big breakfast” will be available for RMB35. And co-owner / honorary Canuck George Smith will have Canadian barley pop a.k.a. Moosehead at RMB15 a bottle.

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The Beijinger organized a massive quiz night at Tun last year that brought together six of of the city’s quiz masters: Josh Lally of Lush, Graham Forbes of Frank’s Place, Julian Fisher of Tim’s Texas BBQ, Paul Eldon then of The Bookworm, Karl Long of Paddy O’Shea’s, and Glenn Phelan then of Danger Doyle’s (see Hello Kitty, Chuck Norris, and nuclear reactors: The mother of all Beijing pub quizzes).

Now a repeat performance is slated for December 5, this time at The Hard Rock Cafe, for charity, and with eight quiz masters. Lally, Fisher, Long, and Forbes (now of The Irish Volunteer) will return and be joined by Robbie Hennebry of The Stumble Inn, Jonathan White of The Bookworm (and The Beijinger), and Jim Kirchhoff and Tony Tao of Kro’s Nest. Given that five of the quiz masters hail from Ireland or England, you better start studying up on cricket, hurling, and the monarchy.

(Come to think of it, we might have to fly DJ Chunky and his gigantic brain back for this event.)

See the poster above for more details.

Update: SantaCon will begin tomorrow (Saturday) at noon at Bang! Bang! Pizza (map) in Shuangjing and Pyro Pizza (map) in Wudaokou. See here for the SantaCon Beijing site and here for Santa’s top five Beijing bars.

The second annual Santacon Beijing is slated for December 11 and means a chance to dress in red with dozens of other people, roam around the city all day and night, and enjoy the holiday spirits (make mine Bourbon). Last year, the Santas met at noon at either Pyro pizza in Wudaokou or at The Brick in Shuangjing before eventually teaming up (I caught up with them in Sanlitun). I’ll post the schedule for this year as soon as it comes available–you can also get details on the Beijing Santacon site.  Finally, I will soon have a guest post by Santa about his top five Beijing watering holes.

See also:

• SantaCon Beijing: Jolly times at Paddy O’Shea’s, Fubar
• In progress: SantaCon Beijing – Tour schedule, updates…
• SantaCon Beijing: Eat, drink, and be jolly this Saturday

A little more than two months after its club Lantern closed in Sanlitun, electronic music outfit Acupuncture will return to the scene when it teams with Mix to open The House Club near Workers Stadium North gate on December 3. Here is how an email from Acupuncture describes the project: “A three-storey space with hip minimalistic interior design and cutting-edge visual installation; a seven-day affair full of non-stop music ranging from techno to house to retro dance, the capital’s latest hallmark of nightlife is set to push and stretch the boundaries of electronic sound culture development, re-defining all past propaganda and rhetoric, and reviving life into Beijing’s electronic dance scene.” Whew! All I know is that the “sound culture development” better be harmonious or there’s gonna be trouble.

Gung Ho! pizza has given its menu some local twists by adding sweet potato and pumpkin, Xinjiang lamb, and Beijing duck pies. It has also added four dipping sauces (RMB5 each), including blue cheese and honey mustard, for that leftover crust. Speaking of which, after a few months of ordering from Gung Ho!, I can say: 1) I appreciate the whole wheat option but find the crust can become brittle, rather than simply crispy, as it cools, 2) the tipping point for deciding to order from Gung Ho! is the salad (I like pizza from numerous places, but Gung Ho! has the best pizza-salad combo, and I especially like the Greek salad), and 3) while there were some problems early on, the people answering the phone have been both friendly and efficient these past few months.

Fans of the former Sequoia across from the Brazilian Embassy near Ritan Park will be happy to know the cafe has relocated nearby: you can now get your sandwiches, coffees, desserts, and the like in the Jianguomenwai Diplomatic Compound, with delivery being business as usual. The new cafe has space for about 30 people and everyone who orders an espresso this month gets a free muffin or cookie, says co-owner Frank Siegel. Sequoia Cafe also has a branch on the B1 level at The Kerry Centre.

Finally, you don’t see a lot of paella parties in Beijing but Spanish wine distributor MPC and South Sanlitun restaurant Ole, beside Salsa Caribe and across from Nanjie, will hold one on December 1. Your RMB90 gets you Spanish wine or Sangria plus two different kinds of paella.  RSVP with Vincente at v.muedra@mpc2008.com or 6773-4688.

Where's City Weekend's fashionista crew when you need 'em?

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Given the time he spends shopping for clothes, playing the drums at open mic nights, and canvassing for votes as a Mr Laowai candidate,  it is a wonder that former Parkside and Union chef Zach Lewison has any left for his new job as food and beverage coordinator at the soon-to-open Kro’s Nest. But there he is sweating day in and day out at the oven–when he isn’t doing chin-ups from a piece of rebar above it, that is. I talked to Lewison about kitchen plans at the new Kro’s Nest, expected to open in the middle of next month. (And yes, while he is aiming to be crowned Mr. Laowai, he is joking around with that last answer.)

Dairy Queen is beside the new Kro’s Nest and has RMB10 hot dogs. How can you compete?

They don’t have hot dogs at that Dairy Queen. They only have blizzards and sundaes.

What if they get hot dogs?

Hmm, I don’t know.

And what if they make a blizzard pizza? I’m just saying…

Well, we’re doing a dessert pizza. We bake the crust and cool it, then add melted chocolate, whipped cream, fruit, and other stuff.

Any other cool pizzas?

The Cheese Burger in Paradise: It includes tomato sauce, ground beef, a mozzarella and cheddar mix, dill pickles, raw tomatoes, and more.

We also have pizza sliders. We use dough on the top and the bottom, with the ingredients in the middle. The reason I came up with that idea is we’ll have people coming in looking for a burger and we can offer them the pizza slider or the Cheese Burger in Paradise.

What’s going on with the beverages?

We’re doing a decent-sized wine list, with 20 bottles and three by the glass, plus we’ll have draft by the pint and yard. There will be bottled beer and cocktails, including one called the Flaming Kro, kind of like The Simpson’s Flaming Moe. And we’re doing milkshakes and floats.

How about a shooter called the Kro Job?

The bar at night is called Kro Bar but there are no shooters for now.

Change of topic: Kro’s Nest sounds like a place where I would eat worms. Birds plus nest equals worms. What’s up with that?

Kro’s nickname comes from his youth. Where does a Kro live? In a nest. So you are coming into his restaurant, into his nest.

There are no worms?

If there are, you should probably get a discount.

Chinese cheese: Does it work on a pizza?

It could work but you’d have to be more gourmet. I wouldn’t do that at Kro’s because it doesn’t work with our pizzas.

What’s your favorite pizza?

I’m a simple guy, I like a margherita, hand tossed.

If you could be any pizza ingredient, what would you be and why?

I’d be the sauce, because this new role as food and beverage coordinator means I have to be the base for the food, the solid foundation.

If you are elected Mr. Laowai, how do you plan to change the world?

There will be more photos of me which will automatically beautify the city. If you remember, they put my picture on Union’s giant billboard and that brought in more customers. If I win the Mr. Laowai contest, it’ll probably bring in more tourists, more people who want to be a part of Beijing.

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By the way, Lewison mentioned some new cooking techniques and it sounds like the droop won’t factor on some of those massive pies won’t be an issue at the new place. For more on the place, see: The new Kro’s Nest: Pizza oven vs front door, plus Q&A and a pic.

The heat is finally on, a summer’s worth of bum sweat is cooking out of the average taxi driver’s seat, and the scent of coal dust hangs in the air. Yes, winter is on its way and if that doesn’t make you want to participate in one of the wine industry’s biggest marketing schemes, the annual release of Beaujolais Nouveau, I don’t know what does.

I know it is fashionable to look down on Beaujolais Nouveau parties but this event is less about the wine and more about having an excuse to get totally plastered, lose your a) wallet, b) socks, c) heart or d) all three, and wake up in a strange bed in some Beijing suburb you never heard of dressed in a security guard uniform with the front right pocket full of chuanr. I’m not saying that happened to me, only that you are better off in pursuit of such joie de vivre than of quality wine at these tastings. Here are a few going on tonight:

• Enoterra (Enoteca): free tapas and Beaujolais Nouveau at RMB200 per bottle
• Scarlett: free-flow Beaujolais Nouveau, cheese, and cold cuts from 7 PM to 10 PM for RMB318
• Top Cellar (LG Towers branch): tasting from 7 PM to 8:30 for RMB50

Can I get Belgian fries with that?

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Quick quiz: Where did Dr. Evil of Austin Powers movie fame grow up?

Answer: Belgium.

Just thought I’d get that out of the way before moving on to Belgian gourmet “week”, slated for November 15 to November 29. With places such as Beer Mania, Morel’s, The Tree, Nearby the Tree, W Dine and Wine, and Vandergeeten participating, that should mean everything from chocolate to waffles to beer. Here are some of the deals:

Beer Mania: Happy hour prices on Hoegaarden and Stella draft for two weeks, plus on one bottled Belgian beer each day, and on all Belgian beer on November 29

Morel’s: Dinner with salad, stuffed tomato, pumpkin soup, veal tenderloin or salmon, and cafe liegeois, plus a bottle of Belgian beer (RMB280).

W Dine and Wine: Choice of three starters, three mains, plus dessert, for lunch for RMB98; three-course dinner menu includes options plus a glass of wine, soda, or local beer for RMB150

Nearby the Tree: Waffle with a regular coffee or tea (RMB35)

The Tree: Bottled Leffe Brown or draft Chimay white at RMB 30, with bottled Chimay White at RMB35

For all details, see here.

Photo: Mill St.

Canadians in Beijing finally got a beer of their own when Moosehead lager and pale arrived earlier this year. Now they have more choice with the arrival of beers from Toronto’s Mill St., named “brewery of the year” at the 2007, 2008, and 2009 Canadian Brewing Awards. I spotted four at Fubar last night, including the Tankhouse Ale, Stock Ale, Mill St. Wit Beer, and Balzac’s Coffee Porter–for those interested in such things, the latter won a gold medal at this year’s Canadian Brewing Awards. Each costs RMB40 a pop (RMB30 during happy hour). Drink us, hosers.

Update: As usual, I asked someone to oversee the draw, which involves writing each participant’s name on a piece of paper, scrunching up the papers, and then picking one of them. Flamme chef Jeffrey Powell did it this time, and the winner is Alex B.

I’m teaming up with Culinary Capers again for a turkey dinner giveaway to celebrate Thanksgiving (U.S. edition). The past two years, the winner received a takeaway bird, all of the trimmings, and vino from The Wine Republic. This year, the winner needs to dress up and find a date: the prize is a turkey dinner for two with six oysters and two glasses of sparking wine at Culinary Capers’ restaurant Switch in the 798 Art District on November 25.

To enter, all you need to do is leave a comment and let us know whether you like dark or light meat. This will be a draw but rest assured I am working on a merit-based contest for those who have been asking for more of those. Deadline is Monday at 2 PM.

Note: The Switch turkey dinner includes a choice of butternut squash soup or salad with pears, hazelnuts and maple apple cider dressing, plus turkey with gravy, cranberry chutney, stuffing, mashed potatoes, and root vegetables, plus citrus pumpkin tart for dessert. Turkeys with all the trimming also available (RMB850 pickup, slightly more for delivery).

There will be two seatings on November 25, from 6 to 8 PM and from 8:30 PM onward, and turkey dinner will also be available on November 23 and November 24. RSVP with Jenny at 136-9338-6984, 5978-4918, or jenny.zheng@culinarycapers.cn.

See also:

• Turkey time: Win a Thanksgiving dinner for six and a bottle of wine
• Gobble, gobble II: Win a free Thanksgiving turkey dinner and wine

Note: If you couldn’t make it yesterday but still want to get some syrups and liqueurs (RMB50/one-liter bottle), they’ll be available at Fubar tonight and tomorrow night, 7-9 PM, or until everything is gone.

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I don’t consider the merger of fire and booze to be a merry one because it almost always means alcohol being burned off of some concoction that will be sucked through a melting straw, often involves some kind of annyoing “flair” bartending, and occasionally can lead to one becoming, or almost becoming, a eunuch by flame. But there are exceptions and on my list I am adding the Burnt Brandy and Peach Sour at Flamme.

Here is the drink’s description in the menu: “Peaches caramelised in a pan with sugar and burning brandy and then shaken with Cognac, lemon juice, and Grand Marnier before being served chilled on the rocks.”

Mathew pan-fries the peaches in front of customers and says he uses a bit of over-proof rum to kick-start the process. The result is refreshing and fruity, with a nice sour edge and some froth. This drink is RMB50, unless you go on Monday, when it is all-you-can-drink cocktails and draft beer for RMB100.

By the way, I am a much bigger fan of the drinks than of the bar at Flamme. so good news that it will be redone next month.

See also: Flaming Lamborginiing at Browns: In the Line of Fire

Yes, we can! Ask yourself: Are you a wiener or a bean?

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What do wieners and beans, Egyptian mummies, and one-night stands have in common with “uncovering innovation”, this year’s TEDxBeijing theme? If only the organizers had asked me to speak, the attendees would have known. But thanks to an innovation that ranks with the screw cap, bell bottoms and forward pass–I speak of course of the Internet–they still can. Here are ten bits of wisdom, from my treasure trove of thousands, as posted on Twitter this afternoon (follow me here).

• Innovation is like a can of wieners and beans. The first step: How do i get this dang thing open?
• Next step: Am I a wiener or a bean? That’s where innovation happens. Everything else is sauce.
• And when you put your wiener or bean on toast or add spice: That’s *marketing* of your innovation.
• An idea is like a duck shot in one wing by a blind hunter during a hail storm, and looking for a place to land.
• Uncovering innovation is waking up with a wicked hangover and last night’s stand beneath the blankets is a robot.
• Uncovering innovation? I was on a dig in Egypt and right between two mummies I found a SIM card. Explain that.
• The pyramids are not made from Jell-o. Jell-o is not made from stone. Think about it.
• We need to move behind innovation. We need to innovate innovation from inside out and outside in.
• I prefer to OUTovate using multilateral cooperation with relevant stakeholders to create paradigm shifts.
• Everyone asks egg before chicken or chicken before egg? I want to know where the frying pan came from.

(Original source of photo here)

I started to write about the Beijing nightlife scene just over five years ago, in October 2005, first with an e-newsletter for friends and acquaintances, and then–after they told me to put the info online because that’s what all the cool kids do–with this blog.

The deal with my boss: Don’t mention the company name. The deal with myself: Write from a consumer perspective, never take money from bars, and try not to get my head kicked in by angry managers and owners. Also, assume the reader is smart.

Assuming the reader is smart is an essential ingredient of this blog. (Call it the cucumber slice in the Hendrick’s Tonic or the splash of bitters in the Manhattan.) It means acknowledging that if you post bullshit, even well-crafted bullshit, some readers will either jump on you or simply stop visiting. (And those are the kind of readers you should keep.) It doesn’t mean you need to be an expert or readers to agree with you, but that you need to be honest about your qualifications (I am a consumer) and to  tell it as you see it and to explain why (I have tried to do this).

Those closest to me know this blog creates a lot of problems: It costs time and money, makes some bar managers, owners, and media angry, and is a magnet for sometimes tiresome types, from those who claim they know more about the scene (probably) or are better writers (even more likely) to those who accuse me of taking money from bars (I don’t) or tell me I am stupid for not doing so (I might be). So why continue with a project that is time-consuming, money-losing, and headache-inducing?

Because I like to share information, I enjoy a good drink, and I appreciate this site’s readers: you. (Well, most of you.) My general policy is to spend my own money on drinks unless it is free for everyone because that is the best way to know if they are worth it and, as do most people, I seek good value. I post about soon-to-open bars or creative drinks or upcoming events because, again as do most people, I like to try new things. And I spend time organizing contests because I like giving stuff away and the answers often make me think (cucumbers on a pizza?) or make me laugh (Axel Rosé wine?). There are also a few benefits: Sometimes I get invited to try new foods or drinks, sometimes I get to meet wine makers or chefs or writers, and, most importantly, sometimes I become good friends with people I have met through this blog.

In the end, writing this blog hasn’t been brain surgery, rocket science, or even making a pousse-café. It’s been a labor of like I started five years ago when, with a year in Beijing under my belt, I decided to share my nightlife experiences with friends. That’s all. (Although if some fabulously wealthy person wants to be my patron, or someone knows how to make this blog financially viable without selling it out, it would be fun to write full time. Interested parties, please email me at beijingboyce (at) yahoo.com.)

To the readers of this blog, a big thank you, especially to those who have been around since the beginning, to those who give me ideas for posts or pass on information about a bar scene I cannot possibly cover by myself, to those who have helped with everything from design to proof-reading to IT help, and to those who put up with my occasional mistakes and “unique” sense of humour. All I can say is this site works because it’s a team effort.

(Note: Over the next couple of weeks, I plan to write some posts related to my five years of bar writing, including the biggest changes in the scene since 2005, the downsides of doing a blog, and my five all-time favorite Beijing bars. Finally, I took that photo of the license plate from a moving taxi at the Dongzhimen roundabout just over five years ago. It’s hard to believe how much the bar scene has changed since then.)

Can I haz infusion? (Photo: Mao Mao Chong)

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Mao Mao Chong wuz robbed.

Not only did it not rank among the world’s top 50 bars according to a Drinks International survey, neither did any drinking hole in China. Guess which places had the most top bars? Easy one. New York and London: what they lack in population, they make up for in drinking (if you believe the magazine) and a sense of self-importance (if you believe my alter ego Joyce Bim). Meanwhile, India took four spots, all of them ranked above the lone entry from Japan, because one would never associate Tokyo with quality bars, would one? And get this, there are four places named Buddha bar on the list: one each in Paris, Kiev, Dubai, and London. Maybe they are part of a chain.

At this point, I don’t care, I just wanted to eventually make the point that the tasty winter drinks menu is available at Mao Mao Chong.  I usually list one or two items from a menu, but screw it: I’m including all eight to make up for the oversight by Drinks International (ex-China).

• “Adult Chai: Our own homemade chai made with Indian black cardamon and fresh ginger spiced up with a naughty shot of Mao Mao Chong cinnamon infused vodka.”
• “The Dirty Boogie: A wonderfully rich mix of Bourbon, Cherry Brandy, Swiss Cocoa, Vietnamese Arabica Coffee and Sweet Milk.”
• “Old Gold: Big splash of Bacardi Black, rich Vietnamese coffee and topped with a scoop of Rum and Raison Ice cream.”
• “Mulled Wine: A smooth Chilean red warmed and spiced up with cinnamon, cloves, ginger, brown sugar and fresh orange.”
• “French toast: A delicious marriage of Advocaat, Rum, warm milk, cinnamon and honey.”
• “Cookie: A simply Luscious mix of Bailey’s, butterscotch schnapps, cinnamon schnapps and hot chocolate.”
• “Golden Lady: Amaretto warmed to perfection and mixed into orange juice with a cinnamon stick.”
• “Naughty Night Cap: Rich hot chocolate or Vietnamese coffee with your choice of Kahlua, Amaretto, Jamieson, or Bacardi Black.”

Mao Mao Chong is open evenings, 5:30 PM to midnight, except Tuesdays. So, as Wang Chung once put it: “Everybody have fun tonight / Everybody Mao Mao Chong tonight.” Or something like that. See the MMC drinks menu and the map. (If you don’t like maps, try this: turn down the alley beside Pass By Bar, walk about 300 meters, and you’ll eventually see a round sign on your right that says Mao Mao Chong.)

• Join bartender Pat D and distributor China Wine & Spirits for a syrups and liqueurs demo and sale. CWS is selling off one of its lines of syrups and liqueurs, and home bartenders can pick and choose from more than a dozen kinds at RMB50 per bottle. The sale and some cocktail demos by Pat D start at 7:30 PM on Sunday at Fubar (more details here).

• The second Zeta pole dancing contest is this Saturday night from 10 PM and word is a few VIP tables are still available. Otherwise, entry is RMB99, includes one drink, and brings the potential for pulling a hamstring simply by watching the athleticism of the contestants.

• The second annual Beer Jing party is slated for Saturday night at The Stumble Inn (Beer Jing is co-organized by distributor Dxcel and magazine City Weekend). There is a private party from 7 PM to 9 PM for the diligent who completed their beer passports, and Beer Jing buckets–five beers for RMB100–from 7 PM to 1 AM.

• Last but not least, The Other Half has opened at the back of International Wonderland, near Turay’s African Restaurant. This two-floor outfit has a bar downstairs and a dance floor upstairs, the latter to formally open in a few weeks. As for beverages, shooters are RMB20, beer starts at RMB25, mixed drinks at RMB30, and cocktails at RMB40. The owner says the place has Italian food and will be open afternoons for those seeking a place to grab a coffee and chat or surf the Internet. (Hat tip to Fergus)

“This cheese should smell like a cave.”

I found that an intriguing introduction as we prepared to try fromage number four at a cheese and wine pairing on Monday night at Paper. Our end of the table had plenty of reactions.

• “He’s right: it does smell like a cave.”
• “I think it tastes like a cave but doesn’t smell like one. It smells smoky.”
• “Let’s be more specific. It smells like the northeast corner of level B3 in the Shuangjing Carrefour car park after a heavy rain [if the smell includes hints of silver iodide, change that to “after an induced rain”].”
• “I’m not a caveman.”

That cheese–Saint-Nectaire–stood out as the oddest of six on a night of nibbling and sipping. It would be an excellent item for a game of Twenty Questions.

“First question: Is it made of milk?” “Yes!”

“Does it smell like a cave?” “Yes!”

“Is it cave cheese?” “Bingo!”

The cheeses were provided courtesy of Paulin Assouvie of Votost while Philip Osenton of Wine Culture and Carole Lahournere and Romain Vandevoorde of Le Baron supplied the wines. Here are some takes on the night.

• While the Saint-Nectaire is love it or hate it, most of the other cheeses, including the Brie, Camembert, Neuchatel, and blue were tasty and accessible. My favorite: Maroilles. This one had a washed rind and a soft chalky texture that became buttery in the mouth. And it was a bit stinky: think a touch of ammonia plus the odor of three-day-old toe-jammed socks. (See, just because I didn’t go to the Yen Halloween party doesn’t mean I can’t bring up my fetishes.)
• Favorite pairing: The Blue D’Auvergne with the Primo Joseph “Moda” Cabernet-Merlot 2006 (Wine Culture). I like this wine because of its strong fruit: Osenton says the grapes are dried on straw mats for more concentration. It blended well with the cheese.
• Most intriguing pairing: The Camembert went well both with the Jean Chartron Bourgogne Chardonnay 2006 (Wine Culture) and the Domaine du Mas Blanc Cosprons Levants 2004 (Le Baron). As Krishna Hathaway from Aman Resort put it: the cheese made the white wine taste better while the red wine made the cheese taste better. Call that one a toss up.
• Most intriguing wine: Domaine du Mas Blanc “Le Blanc des Junquets” 2007. I liked it because the aroma evolved in the glass: I picked up some herbs, flowers, minerals, a touch of honey, and some kind of medicinal odor. (But, unlike with the Saint-Nectaire, no socks). Someone else described it as “like tea”. Given we drank a pair of bottles, and a couple went to the reviewers listed on the bottle, there are at most only 296 left (it was a 300-bottle run).
• Favorite part: The distinctiveness of each wine and cheese.

I also enjoyed trying Paper’s lapsang souchong-infused Jameson’s, though I’m not sure a second glass was smart on a Monday night.

This event was hosted by Shauna Cho and Shanti Christensen of Paper. You can find some of the cheeses at Aman Resort, Scarlett, and Café de la Poste. For the wines, check the websites of Le Baron and Wine Culture (Osenton notes the “Moda” Cabernet-Sauvignon is available at Maison Boulud and the Fairmont Hotel).

Other wines tried: From Wine Culture–Marcus Molitor Wehlener Klosterberg Riesling Kabinett Trocken 2006 (Germany), Cape Campbell Reserve Pinot Noir 2006 (New Zealand), and Irvine Pinot Gris 2006 (Australia); from Le Baron–Château Bel-Air Perponcher Grand Vin Blanc 2007 and the Champagnes Soutiran Blanc de Blancs (Grand Cru) and Lassalle Cuvée Angéline 2002 (Premiere Cru).