Beijing Boyce

A quick update:

China Doll reports that Quincy Jones, Chris Tucker, Venus Williams and Serena Williams will attend a VIP party at the club this Thursday. Meanwhile, word is that Evander Holyfield is in town. Look for an update of our watch either tonight or tomorrow morning.

By the way, we have yet to hear from Jared Leto. Our offer remains open.

Foreigners who more than five years ago predicted the following would happen in Beijing, please raise your hands:

That two Olympic mascots named Huanhuan (an Olympic flame) and Yingying (a Tibetan antelope) would jitterbug on a beach volleyball court with a dozen cheerleaders in skimpy neon green bikinis to The Offspring’s “Pretty Fly (For a White Guy)” while Chinese grandmothers with grandchildren on their laps clapped along. Oh, and that a cup of beer would cost five kuai.

Anyone? Anyone?

(Unfortunately, the musical director later played The Ramones’ Blitzkrieg Bop during the Germany match.)

Last Friday ranked among the better nights of my Beijing bar crawl life – expect an update this Friday on the more than two dozen places visited during the Olympics opening. But last night ranked among the worst - or at least the wettest.

After dinner at a friend’s house, I dropped into a bustling Paddy O’Shea’s about 11 PM on my walk home. The plan: to enjoy a pint while simultaneously watching badminton, archery, and volleyball. Manager Gleann Phealan headed off as I sipped my suds and watched the unintentional comedy of a dozen drunk Australians trying to figure out how to get to Club P (they gripped a full-page ad torn from Agenda magazine: who says marketing doesn’t work). Thirty minutes later, as I continued my walk, I received a call from Phelan and dumbly answered. He had gone to check out the newly opened bars Bling and All Star, found both closed, and suggested we meet and have – note the singular – “a” beer. Here is what ensued:

Stadium
We met at Drei Kronen 1308, the huge German pub slated to start pouring its homemade brew on August 16, and found the windows darkened… but the door open. We sauntered in, ran into the security guards, gave them the international sign for drinking beer, and were directed upstairs where we found ourselves in darkness. A second visit to security resulted in an escort through that unlit third floor, across a glass walkway, and into the sports bar Stadium. Given our experience, it’s not surprising we were the only customers in this nicely designed two-floor bar. This place has potential if, you know, people can find it.

The Den
It was moderately busy downstairs (I didn’t check upstairs, which is HQ for Danish fans). We had a Kilkenny, watched the Olympics (this place provides a good mix of televised sports), shared three years’ worth of Den stories, and then headed out as the sky started to spit rain. This is when we should have – but did not – go home.

Nanjie
A visit cut short due to a second floor closed. Why? No idea.

Tun
We were the only customers (thus, no problem getting the pool table) except for two women who later sauntered down from the upstairs lounge. Tun has a decent beer selection and we enjoyed bottled Stella while Glenn showed the pool skills acquired from a misspent youth.

The Rickshaw
We arrived soaked after a 200 meter sprint from Tun in the pouring rain. I like The Rickshaw because it spent the cash to get the NBA Channel. And I suppose I can live with the recent 15-percent surcharge due to increased costs for food, logistics, and so on. But in return, it would be great if the place improved its service, which in my experience is defined by mixed-up orders, oblivious staff, and general efficiency. Take last night: given the Olympics and given this is a sports bar, you would think some TVs would show the events. Nope. Every TV was off, and even after we requested some Olympics coverage, the best the staff could do was CNN. We took that as an inspiration, and finished our beers and headed off into the night, our sneakers squishing with every step.

Bling and All Star, the two heavily hyped bars that opened in Solana less than a week ago, are closed for renovations. According to the manager, both places will re-open tomorrow, with All Star slated to open 6 AM and operate 24 hours per day.