Relaxing with mates at a pub, writing blog posts in a lounge, having “just one drink” with an associate – it’s usually on those occasions that, through a twist of fate, you end up on a bar crawl that merits entry into the “One of Those Nights” Hall of Fame. It is unplanned, it is (at least partly) unforgettable, and it is usually costly, both financially and physically.New Year’s Eve is different. The pressure is on. You’re pretty much a failure unless you emerge with at least one tale of your craziness… your zaniness… your wackiness.
Like getting completely wasted with your girlfriend and her visiting mother, accidentally French-kissing the latter at midnight, and going back for seconds.
Or drinking two bottles of Champagne, blowing your nose on a stranger’s qipao, and waking up covered in carrots on a cement bathroom floor while wearing someone else’s thong.
Or discovering the next day that everything smells like chloroform, you have six inches of stitches on your lower torso, and you feel lighter by a kidney.
Or that you have cigarette burns in your socks, lipstick stains on the back of your knees, and a Cincinnati bowt… well, I guess some tales are better left untold.
(Note: These are examples, not my experiences. I’ve never been to Cincinnati.)
In short, I don’t like such pressure. If I’m to end the night as a fool, I don’t want to see it coming, let alone be involved in the planning.
For me, New Year’s Eve is time to invite over friends, get out some cheese, crack the seal on a nice single malt, and watch Team America, Beerfest and – “for the ladies” – Steel Petunias (or Magnolias – I always forget that movie’s name). Thong exchange is possible, but that’s as far as the craziness goes.
For everyone else, here are some Monday night goings-on.
Jade of Lush / Pyro in Wudaokou notes my weak coverage of what he calls “The Wu” (my apologies) and plugs the Yen party (should be big):
“The main point of the night is to get a great dose of dance music without all the bling that comes with the LED locales of Gongti,” says he. “Last year we had close to 2,000 revelers going hard, mainly expats, but a stronger following from the locals every year.”
The party is at 706 (798 Art District) from 9 PM. Lush is running the bar and the Japanese are handling the cash (sorry, that’s a terrible Yen joke). Advance tickets available around town.
If you are pining for snow, the closest you might get is the frosty confines of China World Hotel’s temporary Ice Bar, just outside Aria. RMB180 gets you two drinks, one inside and one outside (I recommend Belvedere martinis).
Song (The Place) will hold a “throwdown” from 10 PM with DJ Jonty Scruff. RMB480 gets you eats and a half-bottle of Champagne.
Meanwhile at Café Europa, DJ Herbie will be spinning tunes. RMB380 gets you free-flow red, white and sparkling wine, and tapas.
Bed features DJ Loman as well as Champagne / sparkling wine specials – no cover charge.
Houhai wine bar La Baie des Anges has “buy one bottle, get one free” from 9 PM. If you are looking for Champagne and jazz, then Centro might be your flute of Moet.
And Bubble Café+Bar in Jianwai Soho is doing… something. The email I received was light on details – call 5869-2770 for more info.
For those who wish to start earlier, The Rickshaw kicks things off at noon with 12 hours of specials:
– 12-1 PM: Tsingtao bottle / draft – RMB8
– 1-2 PM: Wine, Prosecco RMB25, Tsingtao – RMB8
– 2-3 PM: Corona – RMB15
– 3-4 PM: All cocktails – RMB20
– 4-8 PM: Happy hour; shooters – RMB10; wings – RMB2
– 8-9 PM: Margarita pitchers – RMB25
– 9-10 PM: Belgian fruit beer – RMB30
– 10 PM-midnight: Stella – RMB20; Moet Chandon – RMB500
Finally, check out the James Bond party – the last three digits of this year are 007, get it? Dress up as your favourite character, drink martinis all night, and enter a draw to be shot into space for a make-out session, just like in Moonraker! Wait, there is no such party. Instead, this year’s collective New Year’s Eve marketing genius is promotional lines such as “Let’s party like it’s 2008!”
Seriously, the plays on that Prince song are tired. Let’s save them for rare occasions, such as a tasting of 1999 Grand Cru, parties to remember the championships of the Denver Broncos (NFL), Dallas Stars (NHL), New York Yankees (MLB) or San Antonio Spurs (NBA) that year, or to mark Beijing’s air pollution index coming just a single point of hitting that 2000 parts per million mark.
Twenty-four hours until 2008 my friends…
Wherever you go and whatever you do tomorrow night, eat, drink, be merry and be safe.
Happy New Year!