Beijing Boyce

Resolutions for Beijing bar managers and employees (just trying to be helpful):

I shall not ask customers to pay for my mistakes, such as the difference between the RMB60 I have programmed into the cash register for a pint of Guinness and the RMB50 I’ve errantly printed on the menu; I shall accept the one-time loss of revenue rather than the permanent loss of the customer.

I shall not remove, nor lay hand upon, any glass containing more than a half-mouthful of liquid unless the patron whose glass it is has exited the premises or indicated it be taken away; nor will I hover above said patron waiting for him/her to finish that final mouthful; if I do so because of a shortage of glasses, I will take measures to have more purchased.

I will not pick my nose or ears, scratch my armpits or nether regions, or engage in any other unseemly conduct before handling food; nor will I regurgitate phlegm and mull it in my mouth in front of customers.

I will not practice my Chinese / English / other language with customers who do not wish to do so (and will learn to recognize when they are doing so out of politeness), bore them with lengthy stories about a particular alcohol’s history, or make asides on what are obviously their private conversations.

[Specifically for managers]

I will not chastise, denigrate or mock my employees in front of patrons as it makes me look unprofessional and my customers feel uncomfortable; I will defend those same employees from unreasonable and obnoxious patrons.

In coming issues: New Year resolutions for drinkers; The Pomegranate; ranking Beijing’s free English-language magazines; CD Jazz Cafe; the promise of Summergate Wines; the 400-kuai move; Dongbei dumplings; and more. Happy New Year and cheers everyone! Eat, drink and be merry. Beijing Boyce.

(From Beijing Boyce VII, first emailed on December 29, 2005)